"Knock Knock." "Who's there?" "I am." "Okay, come in."

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why was Lucy fat? Her BMI was over the recommended average.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

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I am green. You are blue. Jokes are infinite. This is too.

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yo mamma so black, she was left out in subzero temperatures for an extended time period and suffered major frostbite all over her body, causing it to become grotesquely black.

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How do you make a plumber cry? You kill his family.

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A man found out that he had hit the lottery and would be receiving 300 million dollars, but he had to fly to china to do so. The man took a plane to China from New York and would arrive within the next several hours. Meanwhile, in australia a god-cow was producing infinitely large amounts of concentrated milk. His milk was so infinitely large in mass that it collapsed on its own mass and turned into black hole; absorbing the entire Earth. The man never got to receive his money from winning the lottery

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Why do you call a person who spits in your cheeseburger? A mean person

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Why did god make women? Because women are equally important when it comes to the birth to maintain or species.

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A Quadriplegic walks into a bar.

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why is dog animal? it is not fish! 18 fits of has hair only have is Buddhist

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What's the difference between Elisabeth Fritzl and Pope John Paul II? Pope John Paul II wasn't imprisoned and raped continuously over a 24 year period in a horrific act of cruelty by his father

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Two muffins are sitting in an oven they say nothing to eachother because they are muffins and cannot speak if they did they would most likely be taken by the US government and studied and assumed to be alien life forms but anyway the muffins were taken out later and presumably eaten

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Why did the moose cross the road? Migration.

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Why was Martin Luther King shot? The shooter strongly disagreed with his viewpoints.

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When life gives you lemons, go sell them for crack.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? How the hell should I know? I'm not a chicken :/

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A man walked into a bar. He got a concussion and couldn't see strait for days.

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How did the blonde trip the brunette? She stuck out her foot

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Whats white and black and red all over? A panda that has just been shot by a poacher.

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What's the difference between your mom and a table? The table isn't a whore.

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Kid- "Where do babies come from?" Mom- (commits suicide)

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Why did the man not get his licence He was blind

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Q. Why did the chicken cross the road? A.Because that's where it wanted to go.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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