You're so retarded that people make fun of you and you laugh with them because you don't understand and just want some friends.

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What did one muffin say to the other muffin? Oh my gosh a talking muffin.

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Two men were standing on the 34th floor of a 65 floor building. They were trapped in a office with one window. here is their conversation: guy1: oh no what should we do??? guy2: I don't know!! this is awful!!! guy1: I have children and a loving wife!!! guy2 walks to the window sill and leans over. guy1: what are you doing? there is more to life we can get through this!! guy 2 jumps out the window guy 1 runs to the window sticks his head out and yells "MAKE MINE CHOCOLATE!!!"

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Q.What is black and white and red (read) all over? A. A penguin in a blender.

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Your mother's breasts sag so low that the late great impressionist artist Salvador Dali mistook them for clocks.

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what goes ha ha ha ..plop? We are all going to die.

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what is the difference between a dead baby in a bag and a dead baby hung in the yard....the dead baby hung in the yard was shot down off the cross after being rmr'd

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This ones for the dudes: Whats worse then having sex with a woman with no penis? Having se with a man

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Ask me if i'm a fish. Are you a fish? Do I look like a fish?

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A dyslexic atheist stays up at night wondering if there is a Dog

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Q: How do you confuse a blonde. A: Put her in a circular room and tell her to pee in the corner. Q: How does a blonde confuse you? A: She says she's done.

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A man travels to the park, and kills a person, throws them in a bag and runs away. He then travels to the grocery store, kills 2 people, throws them in a bag and walks away. He then travels to the gas station, kills 3 people and walks away. He keeps traveling around killing people until he has claimed 69 victims in all. From this, we can infer that he was a psychotic murderer with a perverted sense of humor.

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What did the cracker say to the cheese? You're so cheesy.

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Have you seen the clown hiding from gay people at walmart?

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How do you stop a clown from laughing? Hit him in the face with an ax.

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A Chinese man, a Mexican man and an African man walk into an American bar. None of them know any English and can not order a drink. They walk out promptly, frustrated by the difficulties of living in a strange new world where they don't speak the native language.

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why couldnt luke open the door? he had no arms

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Where did Susie go during the explosion? On her knees to catch it.

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Why did the plane crash? The pilot lost control of the plane.

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Why did the black man cross the road? To get to the chicken!

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Tulips are white and Pansies are pink.

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a man touches girls butt ...... she sharts her pants

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'l give you a nickle to tickle my pickle i'l give you a dime to take you time

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what is black and white and read all over? a bankrupt newspaper that cannot afford color ink because the accountant misplaced company funds.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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