Friends are just like trees. They fall down when you hit them multiple times with an axe.

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Your mom says hi!.........Jinks!!!! yeah yeah yeah yeah yeaaaah.

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Why did the eskimo drag the seal into the igloo? Because the whale wouldn't fit.

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Maths.

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chuck norris threw a grande and killed 50 people then the grande blew up

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How do chinese name their kids? They drop silverware

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Why did the man eat the apple? He had just witnessed a cow butchering and decided to become a vegitarian the moment he got home. He now lives in 1st degree depression because of what he saw 2 hours ago.

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silver bullet?

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If I was trapped in a closet with you and a bear, and I only had two bullets, I would shoot you twice!

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Unbeknownst to the farmer, the pen holding the chickens inside the farm had fallen due to bad weather. The chicken unknowingly wandered onto the road nearby. Thankfully it was rescued some minutes later.

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Why couldn't Stephen Hawking run a marathon? He was struck by a very serious disease, otherwise known as refrigerator to the face, at the age of 5.

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dyslexics of the world untie!

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Happy Monday!

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Robert Dupra getting a girlfriend.

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Why didn't the blonde hook up with the business man? Because he was a raging alcoholic and a severe smoker who was incapable of looking after his 3 kids and he has gone to jail 3 times for public nudity and beating his wife.

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To the 'am i pregnant now?'-section: Yesterday I spilled mustard on my brand new pants. That was just before I went out to some clubs. That night, after I had enjoyed myself with friends and alcohol, while I was walking home I was raped several times by big, black and hung men. It hurt a lot and my anus is still bleeding. My question is: What is the best way to get rid of the mustard stain?

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Knock Knock! Who's There? Interrupting Doctor Interru--- You Have Cancer...

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he was persecuted for his faith.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because there happened to be road in the vicinity of the fowl and the odds of the bird crossing it is very high.

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What is worse than menopause? Falling down the stairs breaking your next....

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Knock knock Who's there Done Done who? Done with waiting out here, let me in you dick!

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deez nuts

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Yo mama's so fat when they asked her if she wanted fries with that she said yes

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Why did a white man get kicked out of the Olympics 2012¿ Because he did not have down syndrome

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops