Why do undertakers wear ties? Because their profession is very serious, and it is important that their appearance has a degree of gravitas.

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A bar walked into a bar. Bars can't walk.

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Why did the blond cross the road? The police officer who arrested her for shoplifting parked his car on the other side of the street.

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12/23/2012

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Why was Timmy crying? Because he got raped in a van

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Relax, close down the place, he wont get very far. The rest of you better stay inside, and I promise you will all remain safe and secure.

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If you're American when you go into the bathroom , and you're American when you go into the bathroom, what are you when you're in the bathroom. Ha, joke is on you because Americans don't pee.

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Your mother is so fat that when she sits around the house she is likely to be there for some time.

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A priest and a rabbi walks into a bar. The bartender looks at them and says "is this some kind of joke?".

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What time is it when an elephant sits on your car? I don't know, you should check the zoo's surveillance camera.

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a white guy, a black guy, and a latino guy all walk into a bar. The white man explains how his family is in turmoil because of his alcholism, the black guy shares his affection for crack, and the latino man explains why he shouldnt be here due to illegal immigration. They all hate their lives. Quack

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How do you make a clown stop laughing? Hit him in the face with an ax.

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What would a man say if you urinated all over his legs? WHAT THE DEUCE?

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Why did the chicken go to KFC? Because it was suicidal.

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What is better than tissues? Correct!

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Two colleague janitors sit next to each other in the coffee room, one says to the other: About yesterday... I checked three times and it looks pretty normal. Sorry... I wasn't around to hear the question the other posed the day before, but I heard it's supposed to be pretty funny with this answer. So... Less is better then none, right?

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What's bad about a Hispanic Women and a White man dating? A: Nothing at all really, unless either of them become involved in drugs, alchohol, or unprotected sex, which can ruin any relationship.

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A man and a Rabbit are in a bar , the Rabbit looks at the man and says, none of this is real.

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why was the boy sad his whole family just died in a plane crash

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what did the boy who liked trucks get for his birthday? POOP

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what starts with f and ends with c k....???? FIRETRUCK

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What do you call a woman who is addicted to crack, has a light mustache and huge saggy tits, has had 4 kids with 4 different fathers and makes her living giving hand-jobs behind the bus station? Mom.

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Michael Jackson walks into a bar No he doesn't. He's dead.

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What did Sammy get for Christmas? Raped.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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