Why did the potato cross the road? It didn't. A potato is a vegetable. It cannot walk, think or speak.

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If chuck Norris is so awesome how come he's not at my house slamming my face into the keybodhdtegdudgegdtdjaowpqhwvsmx vxbdnsksksh

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Your mom is so old she is significantly more identifiable in a crowd of middle-aged men and women.

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-How do you kill a douche? -You stab him untill he cries out in mercy and stops moving.

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Q: What did the serail rapist say to his best friend? A: You're a good friend

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Yo momma so old that she has started to look into an affordable life insurance plan to ensure all her final expenses are taken care of.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't, there is no reason for a chicken to need to cross a road.

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A man walks into a bar. The force of the impact causes serious head trauma and kills him within a matter of minutes.

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Why did the 3 legged dog fall over? Because it was knocked over by a passing pedestrian.

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Who's the slut of the alphabet? C.

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So you are a giggler huh? You ticklish too? Anyway, you ever watched Deathnote? I was gonna ask something kinda important but it disappeared, so you tell me stuff first. Oh, my parents? Well, they where nice and sweet, but lets talk about something cruel and horrible. (If you switch up nice and sweet with cruel and horrible and the opposite, you will get the picture I am trying to pain here) What makes me so much more interesting huh? And why are you afraid you may look like an Alien? HEEEEEY! I am a legal citizen and I am not freaking Mexican!

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What do you call 100 Americans at the bottom of the ocean? A US submarine crew.

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Why did Sarah fall off the swing? Because she had no arms. Knock Knock! Who's there? Not Sarah!

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What gets louder as it gets smaller? A man in a trash compactor.

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Last words of a redneck - "Hold my beer and watch this"

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what do you call a black guy falling down a hill? A hiker with an inconveniance you racist son of a bitch

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Whats big, red and will cause severe injuries possibly fatalities if it falls out a tree? A phone box

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A black man is escorted into a prison. He's the new warden, and he's been shown to his office.

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why did the panda go to the store? to buy milk.

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A man walks in the a bar Now he has 3 missing teeth

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whats white and if it fell from a tree it would kill you ? Pat Butcher

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Your mom is so old that she most likely will die soon.

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Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she's dead.

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If life hands you lemons you're probably hallucinating

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops