What kind of dance does an alien do? None, aliens aren't real.

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A Muslim man gets onto a transatlantic airliner. All the other passengers are privately nervous, but no one mentions it.

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Why did the kid cross the road? To show his friends that he had guts. And man, did he have guts.

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What did the zero say to the eight? I don't know,numbers are inanimate objects so they can't talk.God, what did you think?

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What do you call a fridge painted red and brown? A fridge.

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A middle aged woman walks into a bar. Its Friday and there is a breeze in the air. She leaves shortly thereafter.

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Q: How many cancer patients does it take to change a lightbulb? A: None, they are too weak to climb the ladder.

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why did the chicken cross the road? to get to your house... knock knock who's there the chicken

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What's Green And Has Wheels? Grass, I Was Just Kidding About The Wheels.

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Jack and Jill went up the hill, to fetch a pail of water. Jack fell down and broke his crown, and Jill came tumbling after. Up Jack got, and home did trot, as fast as he could caper, to old Dame Dob, who proceeded to get Jill convicted of attempted murder, as well as several millions of dollars for pain and suffering.

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whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? finding two worms in your apple

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What did god say to Jesus. "Dude, she's not a virgin"

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Why did the man scream when his dog ran into the room? Because he was afraid of dogs.

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Yo mama's so fat, she died of a mixture of obesity and type 1 diabetes.

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A man walks off a bus. How did he get on top of it in the first place?

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My house is on fire I'll probably die posting this joke

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A boy kills DEER & cooks it & doesn't tell friends what it is. He gives a clue "Its what my girlfriend calls Me!..

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A duck walks into a bar and orders a drink. The bartender doesn't understand him because he doesn't speak duck and promptly calls animal control to have the duck removed.

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Q: What did the egg say to the boiling water? A: It'll take a while for me to get hard cause i just got laid by a chick(: hahah.

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I know that a lot of people don't like morbid jokes, for it isn't everybody's cup of liquidized dead baby.

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Why did Sally fall off the swing set? because she had no arms. --- Knock, Knock Whos there? Not Sally.

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dyslexic's Untie

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Why didn't the scientist discover a cure for apathy? He simply lost interest in it.

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What is Mary short for? She has no legs.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops