What's black an blue and doesn't like sex? The 8year old in my trunk.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

How does a boy with no arms or legs cross the street? He doesn't

thumb_up thumb_down +10

How do you find the richest person in Mexico? You take a survey of all citizens that live in the country of Mexico, find the wealth of each individual person, and whoever has the most money is the richest person in Mexico.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

what's funnier than a dead baby? a lot of less tragic things

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Why did the Mexican mow the lawn? He needed money to feed his family and to pay for his daughter's college education.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Why did the girl fall off the stage? Someone shot her.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

A duck walks into a bar, clearly ignoring the 'No Ducks Allowed' sign that had been placed in the window to prevent comedic scenarios.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

A plane carrying an Englishman, an Irishman, and a Scotsman is destined to crash unless some weight is lost. First they drop the spare engine, but there is still too much weight. Then they drop the luggage, but still there is too much weight. All three men then jump out. The plane crashes anyway.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

What came first... the chicken or the egg? How am I supposed to know?

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Why did little Sally fall off the swing? Because Sally has no arms. Knock knock! Who's there? Not Sally.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

What is better than one trillion dollars? One trillion and one dollars... duh.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Do you know what's hilarious? Not rape.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

What did the little boy say when he was asked what he wanted to be when he grew up? Adolf Hitler

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Yo mama's so fat, she died of a mixture of obesity and type 1 diabetes.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

A man walks off a bus. How did he get on top of it in the first place?

thumb_up thumb_down +8

what do all elephants have in common? they are all monkeys

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Why did the kid lose his nose? because his brother chopped it off with an axe.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

what did the little girl with cancer get for christmas? cancer

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Why did the business man jump into a mud puddle? He didn't. He was brutally stabbed to death then thrown in a pigpen in an attempt to conceal the evidence.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Huh? Whats wrong? Why are you mad at me for? Its my name, it has always been so.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Yo mamma so fat when I searched her on the internet, I got 28,000,000 results

thumb_up thumb_down +8

A elderly man was driving down the freeway when he got a call from his wife. He answered the phone and his wife said "Be careful dear, I just heard on the news that someone is driving the wrong way on the freeway." The wife then heard a loud crash over the phone as the drunk driver going the wrong way slammed head first into her husbands car, killing them both intstantly.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

What is the difference between a Camel And a Strawberry? A strawberry is red.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Why did the orange cross half way across the road Because it ran out of juice

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops