Why didn't the boy have any pockets on? He didn't have any pants on

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You wanna hear what's totally out of this world? The moon

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Why did the... Timmy, your mother and I are both tired.

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What did the Muslim say to the Jew? Nothing, as he has been deaf since birth and is incapable of forming coherent speech.

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Why can't Hellen Keller have kids? Because she's dead, therefore does not possess the ability to bear children.

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A mexican, Japanese, and American man are eating lunch one day at work by the window. The Mexican says, "Wow! If I get a taco one more time for lunch, I'm gonna jump off this window!" The Japanese man says, "Wow! If I get a bowl or ramen one more time for lunch, I'm gonna jump off this window!" The American says" If I get grilled cheese one more time, I'm gonna jump off this window!" The next day, the mexican jumped off because he got a taco. Then, the japanese man jumped off for getting ramen. Then, the American jumped off for getting a grilled cheese sandwhich. At the funeral, the mexican wife said, "Oh if i knew he was gonna jump, I would'nt have packed it." The japanese wife said, "If I knew he was gonna jump, I wouldn't have packed it either." The American wife didn't say anything because she was hit by a bus.

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Q: Whats the difference between me and a ghost? A: Ghosts arnt dolphins!

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What happens when you get hit in the face? You get hurt.

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What's big, black, and impossible to swallow? A parking lot. Among many other things.

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A blonde walked into a hair salon. She got her hair dyed black, as she is sick and tired of jokes that scrutinize those with blonde hair.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didnt it got hit by a truck before it got to the other side.

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Periods are red, waffles are blue, some poems rhym, this one doesn't.

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Why did the fat guy pick up a noodle from the floor with his buttcheeks? He felt like pasta.

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Whats bigger than 'burger king'? A. burger

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knock knock who's there? faith

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What's the diffence between a pieace of fried chicken and a Jew? A Jew wouldnt scream in a fryer.

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When were in a zombie apocalypse I will make sure to save you for 40 days and then I will sacrifice you

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chuck norris will never have a heart attack because he has great cardiovascular health.

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A man walks into a pole and says "I know, this pun is lame"

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If I had a dollar for every time I heard a 'women's rights' joke I'd be bill gates.

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Why did the toilet paper roll down the hill? ... To get to the bottom.

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Why did Sara fall off the swing? Sara had no arms! Knock knock? Who's there? Not Sara!

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Why did the woman say ow? She was shot in the foot

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How much wood could a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood? If a wood chuck could chuck wood, it would depend on whether it wanted to or not. If it did want to, it could potentially chuck an infinite amount of wood in its lifetime

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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