Your Mom is so fat, that she went to the doctor's and they told her that she was overweight and needed to get a stomach staple in order to make her lose weight

How are baseball and basketball the same. They aren't football.

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

What's the one thing America's got but the UK hasn't... School shootings

What's the difference between a Mexican and a pizza? A pizza can feed a family of four.

Man: Am i going to be alright? Doctor: No, you're going to die.

A man walks into a bar. Something funny happens.

Barack Obama.

Why dont you greet your friend Jack on a plane? because you will say "hi Jack"

What's the difference between Harry Potter and a Jew? Harry made it out the chamber.

A man walks into a bar and orders 12 shots. "8?" Asks the bartender, to verify he had heard correctly. He feels unsure of giving the man 12 shots but does so anyways due to his financial situation and he hopes for a generous tip. Afterwards, the man kills 9 people in a car crash due to his level of intoxication and the bartender seeps into depression due to his feeling of guilt.

There was once a really smart Hufflepuff.

What did the clown say when he was denied health insurance? Nothing, he died of his pre-existing heart condition.

Who's the best player in Madden 07 on the PS2? Michael Vick.

How do you stop a baby from crying? Slit its throat

How do you make a plumber cry? Kill his family.

Friend: Dude are you going to see the hunger games? Me: But i alreay seen it Friend: Dafuq? its not even out yet. Me: African children invented the hunger games. Friend: -.-

A man walks into a bar. He is promptly taken to the hospital where he finds out that he may have a concussion.

what does a jet and plane have in common? the letter "e"

What is the hottest day of the week? Wednesday

Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Getting your car repossessed.

Their was once a man named Bob Clemens who really wanted to have sex with an underage girl. So one day he went on an online chat site to find one. He ran into this young girl and told her all the things he wanted to do to her and she told him that she had never done anything and really wanted to try it. Bob went over to her house one day and she told him to sit down and grab some cookies while she came back. She came back and Bob gave her the roughest pounding that any human being could recieve.

What looks good hanging from trees? Spanish moss.

Why aren't there any black flesh-colored bandages? Good question.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...