What did Batman say to robin before they got in the batmobile Get in the batmobile

thumb_up thumb_down +24

Why did the turtle take so long on his run? Because he never went on a run he walked.

thumb_up thumb_down +24

Just checked my Tesco burgers in the fridge and they're still within the use by date.

thumb_up thumb_down +24

Why didn't the lttle boy fasten his seatbelt? It doesn't matter, it's too late now.

thumb_up thumb_down +24

Where did the girl go when a bomb was dropped on her? Everywhere

thumb_up thumb_down +24

Jack be nimble, Jack be quick, Jack has a crippling addiction to Cocaine which ultimately led to his divorce and the subsequent loss of custody of his children.

thumb_up thumb_down +24

You scream I scream We all screamed when the chicken crossed the road

thumb_up thumb_down +24

Why was the boy scared? Well, his mother had recently taken up Satanical ideals and in an attempt to sacrifice themselves to the Dark Lord, she drove her car off a cliff and into a lake. Now, with his dead mother in the drivers seat, no way to call emergency services, and 300 feet of water between him and the surface, you can see why he'd be scared.

thumb_up thumb_down +24

What ryhmes with turtle? räpe

thumb_up thumb_down +24

"Why is Barney purple and green?" "Because the producers of the show decided to make him that way"

thumb_up thumb_down +22

What time is it in China right now? I have no idea, it would depend on when you are reading this. Perhaps you should look at a world clock, watch, or some other sort of time-telling device rather than humorous website. Its purpose is not to tell time. However, there are many other places for this. Good luck surfing the web, friend. I have aided you the best that I can. I only hope that you will find what you are looking for.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

what do you get when you cross a puma and a turkey? A horrible abomination of life that begs to be killed.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

-Knock knock -Use the doorbell -Oh... ding dong -Who is it? -Me -Oh -Yeah -Cool -Come in -Okay -Take off your shoes -Alright -How are you? -Good -That's good -Yeah -Okay -K -Oh -Bye -See ya

thumb_up thumb_down +22

Your face is hilarious.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

A jewish man walks into a bar, has a drink, and goes home to his wife.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

Inbreeding is really funny if you think about...

thumb_up thumb_down +22

Q - What do you call a bunch of white people on a bench? A - The nba - Cool Bean

thumb_up thumb_down +22

A brunette, redhead, and blond were on a road trip. Their car broke down in the middle of the desert. The redhead offered to get help down the road, but never returned. The blond and brunette walked the direction the redhead went, but died four days later of heat exhaustion.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

What did the kid with no legs get for Christmas ? A treadmill

thumb_up thumb_down +22

What is worse than the holocaust paying taxes

thumb_up thumb_down +22

What do you call a good anti-joke? something you feel like you should go to hell for laughing at.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

Why did the boy drop his ice cream? He did not have sufficient stability in his arm at that moment causing him to loosen his grip and drop his ice cream.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

What happens when Lord Voldemort tries to kill Harry Potter? He is unsuccessful.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

Help! I've fallen and I can't get up.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops