Your mother is so fat that when she goes to the movies, she usually orders popcorn and maybe a drink.

Why did the old man get the anti aging cream ? He failed 8th grade 50 times.

Why did chuck norris die Brain tumor

What has two legs and bleeds a lot? Half a dog.

A gorilla walks into a bar and gets a banana martini. The bartender thinks that this is peculiar, and then he realizes he is dreaming. He wakes up and tells his wife about this ridiculous dream that he had. His wife ignores him, and the man rolls over and begins to sob because he realizes that his marriage is in shambles.

As they went down the hill Jack tripped on a rock, falling breaking many bones including his neck. In all the hysteria, Jill fell too, however she landed on a rock and now has severe dementia. This was all for a pail of water.

How did the stuntman die? He was gored by a buffalo on a trip to Yellowstone.

Jimmy: I'm like hey, what's up, hello. Jon: I've already met you.

A man goes to his doctor and says, "Help me, my wife thinks she's a chicken." The doctor recommends a nearby psychiatrist to analyze the wife's mental instability, and inevitably she is housed in an insane asylum. The husband commits suicide.

When is a door not a door? When your house burns down.

What's big fat and ugly? A monster

Whats brown and sticky? Brown paint,

How did the girl cross the road? -She didn't, she died because she was blind and didn't see the "don't walk" sign.

Whats worse than a dumpster full of dead babies? A landfill full of dead babies.

What did the caterpillar say when he emerged from his chrysalis? I am a butterfly.

You can pick your friends, and you can pick your nose, but you can't rob a bank! That's a felony. ;)

What do you call a Caucasian in Russia? Russian.

Q: What did the cop do when he saw a mexican in his car? A: Nothing, he was looking in a mirror.

10 mexicans were driving in a car and went off a cliff. what happend? No one cares.

knock knock who's there? the police, we have a warrant for your arrest.

A horse walks into a bar. Realizing the severity of the situation, the bartender heads toward the exit... stumbling over a chair.

What's a dead baby look like? I don't know, I don't fap with my eyes open.

i know a guy called ryan he is a benny he has a combover

Why are the deserts so dry? Obama

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...