patty was in sunday school, the teacher asked her "patty who created the universe?" john sliped into the seat next to her and jabbed her with a pen "LORD ALMIGHTY" the teacher said' good patty now who gave himself for us? john again jabbed her with a pin "JESUS CHRIST" "that very good patty now what did mary say to joseph after they had their 23 child?" john jabbed her " IF YOU STICK THAT DAMN THING IN ME ONE MORE TIME ILL BREAK IT IN HALF!!!" the teacher fainted

Why did the chicken cross the road? I don't know, It's none of my business.

Why did the chicken cross the road? To suck my dick

A man asks his doctor if you can die from drinking to much water. The doctor replies 'Yes you can'

Why did the chicken cross the road? It was a turkey, idiot.

how many blondies were at the mall? none they were too busy trying to find the sun.

I got put through anger management when I was a child it made me mad.

Did you hear about the kidnapping in New York? He woke up.

So, you got to take medications daily or die? Are you in pain my dear?

Listen Supervisor, this is Agent Clarke of the GOV and the WHO, I suggest you respond ASAP, I suggest you put set me in touch with either Lady, or Axel Knight right away, this is a matter of your personal security.

What do you call a fast black man with big muscles? A good source of minorities evolving.

A girl walked into a bar and sat next to a man. She asked what he was drinking. He said something that makes you fly. She didn't believe him. He then went up to the roof, jumped off and walked back in the front door. She got the drink then tried to jump off the roof, and died on impact. The bartender said to the man "You're a real asshole when you're drunk superman."

When life gives you AIDS! Make lemonAIDS!

How do you stop someone from getting cancer? Kill them.

theres a straight guy, a gay guy ,and a jew the weird part is the straight guy hits on the jew and the gay guy which make the situation all akward.

How did Helen Keller's parents punish her? -Gave her a timeout

Why did the woman come out of the kitchen? She didn't.

Did you hear the one about the guy who couldnt find his shoes? No? ok ill talk to someone who will get the reference

Roses are gay, Violets are gay, I f*cked your mom You have aids.

Why did the elephant climb the tree? Because he didn't want to tie his shoe.

Why did the little boy with hepititess die? his mther drove him into the river!

Why doesn't God like pizza? Because he doesn't exist.

A horse trots into a bar. He is left with a bump on his head.

What do you call 20 Investment Bankers buried to their necks in sand? A team building exercise at the beach sponsored by an Investment Bank.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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