Q:why is walmart so big? A:Years ago a man named Sam Walton had a vision for one stop shopping and affordable low prices. And it goes without saying that being a one stop shop must mean you have a lot of inventory thus the size of Walmart is a lot larger to hold and support the increased mass of inventory .

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What do you call a gay mexican on welfare? poor

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Gorillas are black, Roses are red, Were out of milk, GET THE F**K OUT!

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How do you make a mime cry? Hit him with an axe

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Why did the jew save his money? Because his wife has cancer and the radiation treatments are very expensive.

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what did the potato say to the apple nothing food can't talk

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Why did the boy drop his ice cream? He did not have sufficient stability in his arm at that moment causing him to loosen his grip and drop his ice cream.

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When an anvil and a feather are dropped off a building the anvil will hit the ground first because it's heavy

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Ask me any question. Okay, what is your favorite color? I refuse to answer.

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What's black and white and red all over? A penguin that just got shot

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I want to name my dog Syndrome. Then, when I teach him to sit, I can say "Down, Syndrome!"

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Why didn't little Billy's parents get him the new toy he wanted? Little Billy's parents are dead.

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why did sally fall of the swing? because she had no arms... knock knock? (whos there) not sally

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Yo mama's so fat, that she died from obesity.

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Roses are grey Violets are grey I am a dog

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Why did the guy fail his driving test? He was blind.

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An Asian, white, and a black man decide to play Russian Roulette. The Asian goes first and shoots himself in the head. The white man picks up the gun for his turn. The black man runs down the street screaming. Cops see him and the white man holding the gun, both are sent to jail for life for the murder of their friend.

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knock knock who's there? THE ROCKET POWERED FIST!!

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The graduate with a Science degree asks, "Why does it work?" The graduate with an Engineering degree asks, "How does it work?" The graduate with an Accounting degree asks, "How much will it cost?" The graduate with a Liberal Arts degree asks, "Do you want fries with that?"

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Executioner: Would you like to make a statement? Mr Murderer: Yes, I would love to sing a song. Executioner: Very well. Begin. Mr Murderer: There were 6 billion in the bed, and the little one said roll over, roll over. So they all rolled over and one fell out...

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The Blonde Gets 100 % On Her Math Test

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Q: Whats the difference between me and a ghost? A: Ghosts arnt dolphins!

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How long does it take you to count to 5? 5 seconds.

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Fact: 100% of people who drink alcohol will die.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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