Stephen hawking walks into a bar.

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I was sitting in traffic the other day. I was runover.

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What's worse then 10 dead babies in 1 tree? 1 dead baby in 10 trees...

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Why did the boy fall off of the swing? Because he had no arms

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What's green, covered in cookie crumbs, and lies in a ditch? A Girl Scout that was hit by a car.

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Mila Kunis is fugly. Said no one ever.

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what has 8 legs, is brown, and will bite you? my crap

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How do you make a fake baby cry -Put batteries in it. How do you make a real baby cry? -Put batteries in it.

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"knock knock" "who's there" "Chuck" "Get out of here Chuck I hate you!"

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Why was the lemon wearing a blue shirt? Because its red shirt was dirty.

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Why did Santa die? Because he got diabetes from so many cookies

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what did the rabbi say to the priest? jesus christ, your breath stinks.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? The chicken had been running in the road's direction for some time, and continued travelling in that direction despite the road being in the way.

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how do you make Will Smith cry? cut off his toes and fingers.

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How many feminists does it take to screw in a light bulb? Two. One to screw in the light bulb and one to suck my dick.

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9/11 jokes are just plane wrong

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Last Christmas, I gave you my heart, But the very next day, I died.

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Why was the clock off? Because it was broken

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Knock Knock Who's there? Sorry, wrong house.

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Why couldn't billy hear his mom on the phone? Because Billy is deaf.

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Q. how does james bond like his babies A.shaken not stirred but if u think thats bad wait till u see a stirred baby

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Everytime someone says Jamie on this website, he's referring to Dylan, cause he's to insecure to write jokes about anyone else. Please direct all jokes at Dylan Hodge, 14 years of age, living in Queensland, Australia, come to his house to watch the f a g man, suck his mothers p e n i s.

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Where do cows go in their free time? burger king.

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A man asked Alexander the Great if he was gay, yet Alexander the Great was not offended. Why? Because "gay" has a rather different connotation than in the modern world than it did in earlier time periods where it meant "happy". Also, Macedonians, Alexander the Great's native people, did not speak English so he would not understand the question. Also Alexander the Great was gay in the sense that he was actually a homosexual.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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