My brother found a worm in his apple. I dared him to eat it, so he did. When he tried to swallow, the mashed up worm congealed in his throat, killing him. Later, I found out that the worm had poisonous rectum fluids. I was given the Nobel Peace prize.

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Roses are red Pickles are green I leik ur legs and whats inbetween

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Q: Why is daddy wrestling mommy? A: Well Jimmy, that is called sexual intercourse. That is how you were created, and many people of all ages engage in this activity every second.

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Why is it interesting to watch your mum shower? It's Not, its sick you pervert

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Meh, I dont want it anymore! You take it!

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Why couldn't Jimmy have his birthday party at the park? Because little Jimmy passed away several months ago from the result of a vicious genocide committed by a man who didn't properly understand the affect that maiming human beings has on the friends and family members of the person; he was sentenced to jail for a fair and reasonable time for the punishment of the crime he committed in the past.

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Your mother is so ugly that nobody wants to date her because she is hideous.

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Why did the girl fall off the swings? -because she had no arms

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Why do black people like watermelon? Because it good you racist bastard!

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What do you do when a blonde throws a pin at you? Give her a time-out. Throwing sharp objects is not okay.

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Why did the mexican buy 50 tacos? Because he was taking them to the orphanage where he grew up. Isn't that nice?

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What's worse than 10 babies nailed to 1 tree? 1 baby nailed to 10 trees.

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Q: Hey, ask me if I'm a tree. ".. Are you a tree?" A: No.

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Knock Knock Who's there May I come in? May I come in who? . . .What's wrong with you can I come in or not?

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What do you give a gay guy on his birthday? a invition to strait camp

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How does it change many dyslexics to take a lightbulb.

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What is worse then finding an apple in your worm? Not a lot.

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Mexican? I dont care if you are Mexican or not really, it makes no difference to me, I know you, I seen you before. But seriously, I consider you a good friend and all, and it seems we both get along, but you know after stuff happens, are we still friends then or is this all just a mating game thing for you? You can be honest with me, I am a realist, and I kinda like the idea of,the day after tomorrow, wont deny that. Its just that I dont want to lose a good friend in the process, and if this is just you trying to score, then well, I guess its still nice knowing this side of you.

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Q: Whats red and bad for your teeth? A: a brick

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.Ttwo guys walked into a bar. The third one ducked.

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Penis

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Cause Magic Johnson has AIDS

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mohammed ali walks into a bar, gets a drink, signs a few autographs , and a good time is enjoyed by all.

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Why did Jesus cross the road? He didn't. He's dead.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops