Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the Light turned green, indicating that it was a safe and appropriate time to cross

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Hamsters are a lot like cigarettes. They're completely harmless until you put one in your mouth and light it on fire.

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What is blue and has wheels? A disabled Smurf!

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A grasshopper walks into a bar, the bartender says, "We have a drink named after you", the grasshopper replies, "you have a drink named Bob"

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Q: How much wood could a woodchuck chuck if he tore his ACL last week trying out for wood chucking nationals? A: Woodchucks don't possess the ability to chuck wood, nor do they have ACLs.

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How do you make a clown stop smiling? Hit her in the face with a ax!

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So a man walks into a bar. Unfortunately, he had brittle bone disease, cracked open his skull and bled to death on the pavement.

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Young Billy was arrested today for saying he was going to be a terrorist for Halloween.

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Why couldn't the man sleep? Because he was a wax model in a museum, and as we all know wax models are inanimate objects thus incapable of consciousness and therefore incapable of unconsciousness as well. Many other inanimate objects are caught up in similar problems relating to their incapability to do anything.

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Watch brand new car videos at carvideos website

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you know why they're called ear wigs, right? cause they go in your ears! then they wig out? no, they kill you.

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what did "A" and "B" look for when they went to the beach? what are you talking about? letters cannot travel!

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Yo momma, she so fat, she needs to buy extra-large clothes.

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Chuck Norris farted and... several people looked around uncomfortably, not knowing how to react to the embarrassing situation.

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there once was a man from Nantucket. I want to ride in a helicopter.

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What did the deaf-blind kid with no arms and legs get for Christmas? Cancer.

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what's the only thing funnier than a dead baby nailed to a tree? The look on the mom's face.

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How many Dead Babies does it take fill a phone booth? There is an obvious epidemic going around causing millions of babies to die. This is no laughing matter and the mothers of these babies are probably going through therapy to get over their lost.

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Sex

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How did young Austin get home while walking on the side of the street ? He didnt. He was hit by a car.

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no jokes left :( ill try to make some more the ones with nude in my comments is mine

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Why didn't Jacob marry Bella from Twilight? You have to be real to marry someone

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Did you hear about the kid from Oklahoma? No. Yeah, he died.

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so a horse walks into a bar and the bartender syas why the long face and the horse says naaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaah.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops