"New season of Dr.Phil. How does that make you feel?" ANGERY!!!!!

write I if you think we should all yell A when dylan says orange.

Why did the teacher's cat die? It had cat herpes and feline immunodeficiency virus

Chuck Norris was once approached by a woman for whom he had to fight a man to obtain all while doing a mundane activity in an unorthodox manner. He promptly declined for he is married and told the man he only fights for self-defense. He proceeded to put his pants on one leg at a time like everybody else.

Why did the blonde's parents take away her car? She didn't pay for half the insurance like she said she would.

What do you call it when Justin Bieber has sex with a woman? A miracle

Q: Why did the 10 year old squirt his dad with the water hose? A: What to year old WOULDN'T?

How many Jehovah's Witnesses does it take to screw in a light bulb? 2. One to firmly hold the ladder and the other to cautiously screw it in. They are volunteering at the local orphanage and it is wrong to make fun of there religion. We are all different in our own special way.

In the attic lights Voices scream Nothin' seen Real's the dream Leaving the things that are real behind Leaving the things that you love from mind All of the things that you learned from fears Nothin' is left for the years Voices scream Nothin' seen Real's the dream Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Lights, voices scream Nothin' seen Real's the dream Leaving the things that are real behind Leaving the things that you love from mind All of the things that you learned from fears Nothin' is left for the years Voices scream Nothin' seen Real's the dream Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic

What the heck are you gonna do if you're on a picnic and have an ice cream and then the ants crawl on the ice cream, what are you gonna do? You're gonna eat the ants because it's made out of protein.

How many Jews can you fit in a one-person car? --One in the drivers seat, 30 million in the ashtray

Knock knock Who's there A girl scout A girl scout who? A girl scout trying to sell cookies to support her alcoholic parents who beat her

How do you kill a dumb blonde? Personally, I love stabbing them.

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side XD

What's worse than a completely overused anti-joke punchline? The Holocaust.

Q /why do people eat dinner? A/ because their hungry

How do you fit 10,000,000 jews inside a car? It's not physically possible as no car can carry that many people.

whats worst than a trashcan full of dead babies? A baby eating the dead babies.

Son come here OK daddy Daddy what are you doing DADDY NO! DADDY NO!

Why did the woman leave the kitchen? Because her husband was abusive and he killed her for not making him a sandwich. They had to take the body the the funeral home so she could have a proper ceremony. Her friends and family mourned her daeth.

Chuck Norris once round-house kicked someone so hard that he broke his leg.

Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't, it got ran over by a car.

What looks like a penis, smells like a penis and eats penis Nothin ive ever seen

I have 13 hedge hogs in one hand and 4 pineapples in my van how many pikelets does it take to cover the roof. Purple because aliens dont wear hats.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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