what did the indians give the pilgrims? syphylis

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Why did the boy miss the toilet when he was peeing? Cause he was in the shower.

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Q: Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? A: b/c it was dead. Q: Why did the second monkey fall out if the tree? A: b/c it was stapled to the first one. Q: Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? A: b/c he thought it was a game. Q: Why did the toaster fall out of the tree? A: The branch snapped. Q: Why did the little girl fall off of her bike? A: She was hit by three monkeys and a toaster :( MAB99

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Three guys walk into a bar. First guy goes up to the bartender and orders a beer. Second guy goes up and orders 2 beers. Third guy sits down and saves seats for the other two guys.

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What is green and can hurt your eyes? I don't know, but its definitely not a laser pointer.

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Your mom is so old she died

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Why isn't Billy Mays on TV anymore? Beacause Billy Mays was in a tradgic accident where a bowling ball fell on his head, and a couple days later he died of head trama. His family can't bear to hear his voice anymore.

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Two penguins in a bath tub, one says "Pass me the soap" and the other one says "What do you think I am, a radio!"

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Nero, I can barely stay awake, can we chat more later today though? I would really enjoy that, and sleep before that.

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hey I just met you, and this is crazy. I have alzheimers. Hey i just met you.

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What did The Black man have for breakfast? Bran Flakes.

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What's the one thing America's got but the UK hasn't... School shootings

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It's not ok to have intercourse with a woman who say's "No!" But what about "Let go of me!"?

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What's the difference between Harry Potter and a Jew? Harry made it out the chamber.

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Why did the plane crash? Cause the pilot was a loaf of bread

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A man walks into a bar and notices a twelve inch tall man playing a small piano. He asks the bartender about it. The bartender explains that the pianist has worked there for some time, mostly performing on weeknights. The bartender also tells the man that he may be suffering some vision problems, as the pianist is about 5'8" or 5'9". Some time later the man visits an optometrist and finds out he has a severe case of astigmatism.

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What's the difference between a black person and cancer? If you don't know already, you should really question your countries education system and your parents upbringing.

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What did the boy with no legs get for his birthday? A bike

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How do you get the neighborhood hoodlums to stop pushing you over in your wheelchair? Brutally murder their families in front of them.

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what is 3+3= 8

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One time, I saw this guy on stilts and thought it would be hilarious if someone pushed him over. Then some guy pushed him over and broke his neck.

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2 bald men are standing on an oval, one turns to the other and says "leukemia."

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Are you from Africa because YOU GOT AIDS

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Robin Williams walks into a bar. The bartender says why the long face? To which Robin Williams replies, "Because I'm going to kill myself."

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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