Q:Why do you never run over black guy on a bicycle A: Because that is not a very nice thing to do

Ian: Your Mama's so dumb, she tried to commit suicide off a sidewalk. Dan: Yea, and when that didn't work she hanged herself.

Why did the guy die. He OD on drugs

Why was Hellen Keller blind and deaf? Because she was a girl.

Why did the girl fall off the swing? Because she had no arms

We decided to post a joke on anti-joke and see if we can get any rapings

What's fat, round and bounces on the ground? A ball. I lied about the fat bit.

Roses are red Violets are blue Some roses are white 72.4% of Americans are too

Once there was this duck. he was the best dentist in the world...

This guy was walking down the street and a homeless guy asked him for money. The guy said "Why don't you get a job?" So the homeless guy began to cry because all he wanted was a dime not to be humiliated.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, I have five fingers, The middle one's for you.

Q: What's black, white, and red all over? A: A horribly maimed zebra.

Why did the President fall down? He was assassinated. -mattobrado

Doctor: I have good news and bad news. The good news is that your parents survived the car accident. Kid: And the bad news is? Doctor: I have a horrible sense of humor, they're both dead. I'm so sorry.

Mr. Krabs lives in bikini bottom (pinch pinch)

Why did the man leave anti-joke.com? Because he realized that it was time for dinner and the ham was burning.

Why did the boy miss the toilet when he was peeing? Cause he was in the shower.

Q: Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? A: b/c it was dead. Q: Why did the second monkey fall out if the tree? A: b/c it was stapled to the first one. Q: Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? A: b/c he thought it was a game. Q: Why did the toaster fall out of the tree? A: The branch snapped. Q: Why did the little girl fall off of her bike? A: She was hit by three monkeys and a toaster :( MAB99

what did the indians give the pilgrims? syphylis

Q: why was the baker a coward? A: his own mother told him his potential would amount to nothing more than a baker and when a dinosaur came into the bakery he ran away

Nero, I can barely stay awake, can we chat more later today though? I would really enjoy that, and sleep before that.

Two penguins in a bath tub, one says "Pass me the soap" and the other one says "What do you think I am, a radio!"

Your mom is so old she died

What is green and can hurt your eyes? I don't know, but its definitely not a laser pointer.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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