A duck walks into a bar and asks for a beer. The bartender realizing this is an odd situation, seeing that ducks cannot articulate the English language, realizes he must be dreaming. He wakes up and turns to tell his wife about the dream, but she won't respond. He then realizes how his marriage is in shambles...

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What is both bold and brash? Fox

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Roses are red Violets are blue I have Alzhiemers Wait, who are you

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what's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? a Jew is a person and a pizza is a food

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Somebody has robbed your house, how do you gather evidence? Look for traces of watermelon or chicken bones.

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What do you call a three-legged cheetah? Crippled.

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What did the boy with no arms or legs get for Christmas? A scholarship to a prestigious college that he did not deserve.

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The song Barbra Streisand has more than 2 words.

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I cried because I had no shoes until I met a man with no feet... ...then I made fun of him and laughed.

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What is the difference between a bright red Ferrari and a pile of dead babies? I don't have a Ferrari in my garage.

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? He wasn't.

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What do a software designer, a civil engineer, an airline pilot, and a long-distance swimmer's support team have in common? All of them use angles and trigonometric ratios to help solve problems.

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Jesus walks into a bar, the bartender shoot the zombie

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How do you tell when your dog is dead? I don't know. I never had a dog and my parents beat me.

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A blind man walked into a bar. Quite literally.

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Knock Knock Who's there? The KKK, got any blacks?

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Why are Black Guys Black? Migration and adaptation to the harsh heat of the southern Sahara Desert. DUH.

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Knock knock Who's there? Doctor Doctor who? Doctor Adams. You called me about your father's stroke.

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A man walked into a bar. I shot him

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knock knock. who's there? interupting doctor. interupting doctor who....you have cancer.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I'm schizophrenic And so am I

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How do you kill a blonde? Tell her she can breath underwater.

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Salt: "Hi there!" Slug: "AAÀAAAAAAAAAGGGHHHHH!!!" *dies*

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I was expecting something like that... Anyway, good you do not mind in particular, because that means I am just boring myself here, so, tell me something about yourself you don't tell people most.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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