Did you know that Hellen Keller had a roller coaster in her backyard? Neither did she

thumb_up thumb_down -24

Yo momma so poor, she can't afford to live in a two story Cheerio box

thumb_up thumb_down -24

Two Canadian men are sitting in a room. Man 1: Do you know what happens when you shoot a wolverine? Man 2: No. Man 1: It absorbs the bullets, duh. The second man proceeds to go outside with a gun. He returns in a few minutes. Man 1: What did you do with that gun? Man 2: I shot a wolverine. Man 1: What happened? Man 2: It fell over and died. I think you watch too much X-Men.

thumb_up thumb_down -24

Yes 59 10 away from my faverite number....... 49

thumb_up thumb_down -24

What did the black guy get from his white girlfriend for valentines day? An HIV positive test result.

thumb_up thumb_down -24

mmm i love marble bumhole

thumb_up thumb_down -24

How many women does it take to change a lightbulb. None, Thomas Edison was a man.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

A man walks into a bar and gets drink

thumb_up thumb_down -26

How many pianos does it take to change a lightbulb? Two. One to change the lightbulb, and one to play a motivational tune.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

Why did the chicken cross the road? If i knew, I'd tell you.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay

thumb_up thumb_down -26

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because its instincts were telling it that the higher amount of grass on the other side of the road would lead to an increase in the odds of survival due to a more adequate source of food and nourishment.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

When life gives you lemons......you should be really scared because life shouldnt be giving you anything....espically lemons so if life offers you lemons you better run

thumb_up thumb_down -26

What's funny about a dying dog? Nothing.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

A duck walked into a bar and said "ouch."

thumb_up thumb_down -26

Knock Knock Whos There? I'p I'p who? HAHAHAHA

thumb_up thumb_down -26

A man with Tourette's syndrome walks into a bar. Because of his disease, he shouts unexpected profanities across the room, and everybody in the bar bursts into laughter. The man cannot handle the humiliation anymore and goes home. He opens a drawer in his bedroom, pulls out a gun, and points it at his head. His wife walks in on him about to commit suicide. She is horrified. He then looks at her and then down, and he notices his one and only daughter by the age of 7 is by her side. The man ponders his reckless decision he was about to make. Moments later he and his family are holding one another sobbing in each others arms. A few days later the man goes back to the bar and shoots everybody there. Shocked and afraid, he curled up into a ball and regretted his decision. An hour later the police arrived and he was sentenced to life in prison for 3rd degree murder. His wife moved on and started a new family with his former best friend, and his daughter vists him every first tuesday of every other month. The man still suffers from Tourette's and cannot control his ticks and rots in jail. He continues to scream random obscenities for the rest of his life with no parole.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

What did the Christian say to the Muslim. Nothing. He understood his right to have a opinion even if his religion is against it.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

How many dead babies can you fit in the trunk of a car? Depends on the car.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

Why did the chicken cross the road? to get to the other side

thumb_up thumb_down -26

Why did the chicken cross the road? It was commiting suicide

thumb_up thumb_down -26

What did the pencil say to the other pencil? Nothing, pencils do not have the ability to speak as they are an object.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

How can a hobo become rich? It can't. It died from food poisoning from eating food out of the trash.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

A man walked into a bar and a knife seventeen times.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops