How much wood could a wood chuck chuck if a wood chuck could chuck wood? A wood chuck could chuck as much wood as a wood chuck would if a wood chuck could chuck wood.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

What do you call a black priest? "Father" if you are Christian.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

what is black and blue and hates sex? the ten year old in my trunk.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Why didn't the boy eat his vegetables? he was dead

thumb_up thumb_down +13

What do you call a Muslim flying a plane? A pilot you racist! Jk a terrorist

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Why did the giraffe fall over? Because I shot it with a bowling ball cannon,

thumb_up thumb_down +13

- Mom, you have a banana in you ear. - What? Son I can't hear you, I have banana in my ear.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

What do you call a plane in shining armor? A knight flight.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Help i have fallen and i cannont get up Life alert life alert To bad just sit there we dont care

thumb_up thumb_down +13

What did the White guy say to the Black Guy? Nothing... he looked him up and down and spat at him instead.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Bryson got a concussion...he died

thumb_up thumb_down +13

A penguin walks into a bakery. The baker asks the penguin: "What kind of bread would you like? Brown or white?". Penguins answers: "Well, it doesn't really matter since I came here by car!".

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Knock Knock Who is there? Orange Orange who? Orange-Banana

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Why did the chicken cross the playground. He didn't. chickens are unsanitary to have in schools

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Two latino men are drinking at a bar. Suddenly, one man falls off his barstool, unconscious. Later that day, he was diagnosed with pancreatitis, and died never having dealt with his severe alcoholism.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

i hate non minorities!

thumb_up thumb_down +13

what is worse than a hole in your sock? Getting raped

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Why did the teacher ask her student about the test? Because she was in the hospital the day of the test because her husband was hit by a rail road spike and died but she was so devoted to her job she wanted to know.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Question: What is worse then a worm in your apple? Answer: A number of different things I would imagine...

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Why did Biggie Smalls eat so much dark chocolate? His doctor suggest that he eat foods high in fiber.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Nineteen terrorists walk into three airports. Several hours later, thousands of people are dead sending the world into a state of emergency that subsequently changed how we live our current lives under the constant threat of both government oppression and extremist terrorism.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

why did the chicken cross the rode? so it can get the seed that is between the two yellow lines, and then he walked back without getting hit by a car.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

What do you call an art history major with a job? A gainfully employed member of society, who assuredly benefited from his access to higher education (and quite possibly from acquaintances or family members within the company that employs him, though it is often considered impolite to mention this latter fact, as it may be construed to denigrate the aforementioned individual or his chosen field of study).

thumb_up thumb_down +11

knock knock whos there? police police who? police your house is on fire and your kid just died from broncitisand i just farted and u get a tickit because u answered the door naked

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops