Why did Sally fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock, knock. Who's there? Not Sally.

You can pick your ur nose u can pick ur friends u just can't pick ur friends nose.

I still remember the last thing my grandfather said before he kicked the bucket. He said: "Hey, I wonder how far I can kick this bucket."

what do mexicans cross? whatever they want. but in this case their local grocery store parking lot to buy fresh produce.

Roses are Red Violets are Blue I can't wait to shove my finge in you

Roses are blue Violets are too I've got Alzheimer Roses are red

Why was the Asian terrible at driving? He was drunk.

What did one muffin in an oven say to another muffin? Nothing, muffins are inanimate objects thus incapable of sppech.

Knock knock Who's there? Miley Cyrus Holy moly, please come in! Here's your Miley Cyrus CD you order online Thanks you Mr. Mail Man

Why can't Bin laden drive because he's dead

black people

Why did the koala fall out of the tree? It was dead. Why did the second koala fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the first one. Why did the third koala fall out of the tree? Peer pressure.

a white men said to another white men that someone robbed a bank, it was at night and he wasn't wearing a mask, and also the camera couldn't see him, they now found out that he was black.

Why didn't the boy answer the phone when it was ringing? Because he had no arms to pick it up.

What is green and if it fell out of a tree it would kill you? A pool table.

What's worse than being single on Valentine's Day? Finding out your son has AIDS.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, come at me again and I'll punch you

Two muffins are sitting next to each other in the dessert. A hungry and lost man passes by and considered eating one of the muffins. Unfortunately he can't make a decision in time and took of in his 4-wheel drive. The next day a camel walks by and eats one of the muffins. The camel dies instantly, apparently the muffin the camel ate was poisoned. The now not so hungry and lost man looks at the dead camel and noticed the zoo is almost closing now. So he left in a hurry, to cook for his family.

So, this cheerio is in love with a beautiful frosted cheerio. He asks her on a date. She says no, because she only dates other frosted cheerios. So the cheerio works really hard at his job and is promoted to a honey-nut cheerio. So he asks her out again. She says no because she only dates frosted cheerios. So he works even harder and is made a frosted cheerio. He asks her out again and she accepts. 4 months later after a relationship built on trust and understanding they are married and live a long and fullfilling life together.

Whats the difference between a bottle of coke and a black man stuck in a phone booth? one of them is comparing himself to a bottle of coke, the other is a bottle of pepsi

A horse walks into a bar. The bartender says, "Why the long face?" The horse becomes depressed. He didn't ask to look like this. He drinks himself into a stupor, and then crashes into another car on the highway on the way home, killing a family of five. The horse is now in jail for life.

what has genitial warts? me

Q: If your 17 year-old-daughter is a drug addict, how many cartwheels are you going to have to do to make it to Georgia? A: The French Revolution, because your grandmothers facebook shows an 11 year-old selling Concords to a green alien, which can only mean that over 600 people watch pórn daily.

why did the Chicken Cross the Road? Why must you question a Chicken's motives to Cross the Road?

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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