Why did the horse go to the other side of the field? He liked green grass

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How many babies can you fit in a bottle? None, a bottle is too small

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Q; Whats the hardest part about nailing a dead baby to a wall? A; my dick while doing it.

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what's the best way to remove leaves from a tree? take them off

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a man offers an innocent little child some candy from his van upon arrival the child is raped and beaten suverily. -teagan doherty-

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Peaches eat leaches, that is why sneaches live on beaches.

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Why did the African boy die? He was denied any antibiotics to heal his severe case of mono and AIDS, and was living on dirty water and dirt.

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How much does a polar bear weigh? Enough to take three harpoons to the chest and still manage to feast on a family of baby seals...... Hi my name is Joey

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what's the difference between northerners and southerners? southerners live to the south of birmingham, and they don,t stink of urine.

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A Jew and a German meet by chance in a bar. They exchange pleasantries and order drinks. At the end of the evening they leave, having made a friend.

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Pickup line: Hey babe, do you work at a grocery store? Because I wanna spill some milk on the floor so they can call spill on aisle 9 and I'll be there waiting for you and watch you clean my mess.

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how do you make a baby float? you take your foot off its head

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How can you tell that the Filipino presidential candidate Grace Poe is an alien? From her extra set of retractable jaws and highly acidic body fluids.

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So Joe Paterno doesn't walk into a police station....

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WHY IS THIS SENTENCE CAPITALIZED? BECAUSE CAPS LOCK IS ON.

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What is the most confusing day for chavs? Fathers day

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If I had a nickel for everyday I lived...... I would get a nickel a day

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Jesus walks into a hotel, slams four nails down on the counter, and says, "Put me up for the night!" The concierge looks at him and says, "You're not Jesus. Jesus was brutally murdered approximately 1,970 years ago. And although I may not be a believer, his teachings have brought comfort and solace to millions of people around the world. Nor do we accept nails as payment. Please remove yourself from the premises or I will call security."

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A man walks into a house, and the next day was taken to the hospital for a minor concussion and a possible vision deficiency.

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whats big red and eats bricks a big red brick eater

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What did the child say to the clown? For a professional entertainer, you're not that funny.

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Suck pussy

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What's worse than killing 6,000,000 Jews? Killing 6,000,001.

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The way I see it, there are two types of people. Some are female and some a male.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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