A black man in a hooded sweatshirt is sprinting down a back alley. He is trying to get into better shape by exercising and knows a shortcut to his house.

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Why were you at a funeral? Someone died.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side.

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What did the Atlantic Ocean say to the Pacific Ocean? Sploosh

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Roses are red Violets are purple. I just realized that nothing rhymes with "Purple".

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A man walks into a doctors office. The doctor says "I've got good news and bad news. Which do you want first?" The man responds "Let's have the good news." The doctor says "I ran a series of tests and found you have leukemia, but your insurance paid for everything." Shocked, the man asks "What's the bad news?" The doctor answers "Your company is switching to a private insurer and because of your pre-existing condition you're being denied coverage. None of your future treatments will be covered."

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Q: Why is it funny to laugh at gay men? A: They like men.

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Dislike if you are a prostitute

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What makes George Michael gay? The fact he engages in sexual intercourse with other men.

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Whats black on top and white on bottom? Rape.

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what has wheels and runs on gas? a car with feet

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A man jumped off a cliff and wished he could fly. He was hit by a plane

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What's the best way to piss off a feminist? R@pe her.

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Where do babies come from? You fathers penis.

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whats the strongest muscle the man who can't talk has. definatly not his mouth

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Alchohol.

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whats worse than dropping your toast butter side down ? being ripped apart from the anus upwards by a large black man

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What's hard when you eat a vegetable? The wheelchair.

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A blond, a brunet, and a red head jumped off a bridge. Which one hit the ground first? In order to solve this problem you would first need to figure out witch of the three had more of a body mass. Then you would need to calculate the accretion in case one brought along a cow. However, in the end the outcome is always the same: 3 dead bodies on impact and 3 mourning families.

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A black man walks into a bar with a lovely parrot on his shoulder. The bartender asks "hey where did you get that Africa says the parrot...

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Knock Knock Who's there? Charles Grodin. Charles Grodin who? Exactly.

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Simon says, "I'll give you a five second head start before I mow you down with my AK47."

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Why did Susie fall off the swing? Because she had no arms. Knock knock Whos there Not Susie What did Susie get for Christmas? I don't know , she never opened it. Who high fived Susie? No one Why did Susie die? She got shot in the face

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Roses are red Violets are blue Thats what they tell me because I'm blind

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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