What do you call a concentration camp with a mental disability? Auschwistic.

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joe galasso from plainview ny

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Why didnt the vampire have a reflection? You have to be real to have a reflexion

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Hi... your father has testicular cancer and he will die in 2 months....

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Why was six afraid of seven? Because seven's bigger.

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Did you know Helen Keller has a pool? no oh well she does.

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Why were the parents sad? Because their son had a frog stapled to his face and was trying to eat his ice cream on a swing, but he had no arms so he dropped his ice cream into the street and he chased after his ice cream and got hit by a bus

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What's brown and sticky A stick

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Did you know that onions is the only food that makes you cry? Oh? Really? Positive. what if I threw a coconut at you're face. ...

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Knock knock. ... Knock knock. ... Knock knock. ... The FedEx man leaves, realizing that no one was home, and continues on with his job.

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Why did the man drive a van? So he could keep the stuff he stole.

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A man walks into his room with a DVD and a box of kleenex. The DVD is a wedding video of his now dead wife.

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Killing your friend as a joke.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? because

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A panda walks into a restaurant, sits down and orders a sandwich. After he finishes eating the sandwich, the panda pulls out a gun and shoots the waiter, and then stands up to go. "Hey!" shouts the manager. "Where are you going? You just shot my waiter and you didn't pay for your sandwich!" The panda yells back at the manager, "Hey man, I am a PANDA! Look it up!" The manager's heart skipped a beat, and he locked himself inside his office, trembling with fear and confusion. Yes, it was plausible that a beast such as that could point to a random entry on the menu, and it was physically possible for it to pull the trigger of the gun (and, at such close proximity to the waiter, it would be pretty hard to miss him), but it was shocking and altogether disturbing to hear such an animal speak in human language, much less vernacular English.

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Knock knock Who's there? A fireman. You're house burned down.

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Why is it funny when dogs talk ? Answer: they don't

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knock knock who's there? the police, we have a warrant for your arrest.

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Nah really, I start giggling like a dork whenever weird porn or whatever shows up on my computer, its just too weird. Fine ill use my glasses then, thanks for the comment by the way, I was really regretful for sending you that pic, but then again I did not have contacts then, nor did I want to photoshop anything.

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Next up, Sharpi and Ryan take their audition faliure very seriously in "columbine high school musical"

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Q: Why do sharks live in salt water A: Because if they don't the die from blood loss because their blood-cells swell up and explode in non- salty water.

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How do you get a Jew to jump off a cliff? You kidnap his family and threaten to kill them if he doesn’t.

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What is the difference between a black person and an elevator? Well, there are many differences such as the fact that an elevator has a series of wiring and mechanics, while a black man, and white men alike, are human beings.

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when god created an asian he said 'Crispy"

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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