getting up in the morning is the 3nd hardest thing :DDD

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What did Helen Keller name her dog? Well i would imagine one of various names for a domesticated animal and she would choose the name based on her likes towards nature or an element of nature, being the educated individual she i would think she may name it base on a person of importance, such as an author or maybe a writer that inspires her.

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Roses are bitches Violets are two, your mother is a bigger bitch then both

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Don't you just hate it when a sentence doesn't end the way you octopus?

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Waitress: Would you like to have a drink? Customer: (Looks at the drink's menu) Hmmmm... What are my choices? Waitress: Yes and no.

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What goes about 36 miles per hour and screams? A baby attached to a ceiling fan.

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Why didn't they let the black people play baseball? Because they're bigoted bastards.

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Knock Knock. Who's There? Orange. Orange Who? No, this is Homeland Security. We have raised the current terrorism threat level to Orange, which means there is a high risk of terrorist attacks. Please report any suspicious behavior.

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How do you entertain a bored pharaoh? (written in 1600 BCE - Westcar Papyrus) -You sail a boatload of young women dressed only in fishing nets down the Nile and urge the pharaoh to go catch a fish

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Q. What happened to the women who cut her finger? A. she got staff infection and died.

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Why did the boy drop his ice cream? I shot him in the face.

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Stephen hawking walks into a bar.

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getting a call from the hospital saying that your whole entire family was all killed in an explosion and they were killed from your best friend.

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a man makes a bad joke

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A women answers the phone. -"Hello?" -"Yes, hi, have I reached the Smiths?" -"No, you've reached the wrong number" The two women hand up, and continue with their lives.

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What is stupid, black and high? A stupid black kite.

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He who laughs last...is not a laughing owl because they're extinct.

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I was going to type an anti-joke but I totally forgot how it starts. It goes something like something something something something something your mom's a whore.

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u know whats a crime? rape

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Knock knock Whos there A dead boy a dead boy who A dead boy who started tobuy drugs and didn't have the money for it and his family loved him and he was going to go to college

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an elephant is like a guy but its nose is the di**

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Hickory Dickory Dock Three mice ran up a clock The cluck struck one But the two other got away with minor injuries

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A kid walks into a ctholic school and asks about the therory of evolution.

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What does a homeless guy do when he's hungry ? Nothing, he has no food.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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