Why was six afraid of seven? Because seven was convicted of murder and rape

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Why did the man complain of pain in his ankle? Because several consecutive tissue samples of the area revealed a rapidly metastasizing neoplasm. Blood samples indicated the presence of what appeared to be Hodgkins Lymphoma. He had multiple MRI's and bodily fluid tests to confirm the diagnosis. The man was very wealthy, however, and had world class doctors treat him. He then donated a vast portion of his wealth to research. 12% of the donated money went into studying the medicinal effects of Twinkies.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

How much does a polar bear weigh? Depends on the polar bear and its dietary habits

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Why did the policeman who's third wife just lost 20 pounds go to sleep? He was tired.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

why are there so many peadofiles in the world? sexy kids.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

You know what pansies remind me of? What? A flower

thumb_up thumb_down +11

A Higgs Boson walks into a church, and the priest says, "We don't allow Higgs Boson's in here," and the Higgs Boson says, "But I thought Christianity promised acceptance to everyone who believes."

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Whats the difference between a Ferrari and an erection? I dont have a Ferrari!!

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Why did the squirrel cross the road? it was stapled to the chicken

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Dick Cheney That's the joke

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Roses are red. Violets are grey. People hate me. Mongoose.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Wanna know what I don't get? I was gonna say yo face, but that would be mean.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

A man walks into a pole and says "I know, this pun is lame"

thumb_up thumb_down +11

What happened when the man turned on his TV? It was tuned to the Discovery Channel

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Knock knock Who's there? No one ever mentioned someone named "there" it's me, Jim

thumb_up thumb_down +11

A man walks into a bar. He hits his head and dies.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Why do dogs chase squirrels? Beacuse dogs have very low attention spands and also chase cars and cats.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

There are stars in the sky when it's dark. You may have noticed I used a contraction in the previous sentence.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Hi. P.S: You have aids. P.P.S: Purple penis pumpernickel pie puppets.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

A penguin walks into a bakery. The baker asks the penguin: "What kind of bread would you like? Brown or white?". Penguins answers: "Well, it doesn't really matter since I came here by car!".

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Your momma is so fat, she doesn't have a birthday. She has a birthweek.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

what's body surfing? sounds dumb.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

What's the difference between a Jew and a Boy Scout? Boy Scouts come back from camp.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Disreguard Females Aquire Currency

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops