A wise man once told me that friends are like cookies. He was a cannibal.

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Patient: Doctor, do I have cancer? Doctor: Yes. Patient: Will I live? Doctor: No. Patient: So what do I do? Doctor: SUCK IT UP!!!

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What's 1+5 2+4 3+3 4+2 5+1 Whats 6+1 If you said 6 you're stupid.

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what is black and blue and hates sex? the ten year old in my trunk.

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-The proceeding statement is true. -The preceeding statement is false.

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whats worse than getting eaten by a bear a bear getting eaten by a squirrel who ate you too.

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i like your face... HAHAHAHAH just kidding you make me want to projectile vomit.

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Say the line below all very fast to get sudden strange sensation... Magic-ish. I like to find threes and peel of their... BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK... ...BARKBARK BARK BARK BARK BARK! Done? Now sit Down, have a little treat Good boy/girl! :Look well at the sun, the jagged Blackness will consume all, Your little star forever but a ever fading memory.

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why are you going to laugh at this its reallly dumb

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Who is stupid and no one likes him. Me. :(

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Wats blue and always in the sky?? Cheese! Except cheese is not blue and it is not always in the sky... By Rachael Mcmullan

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why does her hair shine so nicely? she uses good shampoo.

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How did the black guy swim across the Atlantic? He didn't. He was prepared to, but then went on Expedia and found a ticket with Continental Airlines that was in his budget. He did not like the amount of service he recieved, and decided in the future he will save up and fly with a different company, or in fact swim across.

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Q: What is the answer to 255 x 23? A: A number!

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Whats the difference between a dog and a bird? They both fly

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Guy 1: What the shit is that car? Guy 2: Its not a car. It's an alfa romeo

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Why did it take Da Vinci so long to paint the Sistine Chapel? Because it was painted by Michelangelo.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Haiku doesn't rhyme, And neither does this

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What did Ed Gein get at McDonalds? The corpse of a worker he killed by the dumpster and hauled back to his shack to hang up and gut like a deer.

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Q: what did Timmy get for his 8th birthday A: killed MR

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"What's black when clean, but white when dirty?" "A blackboard."

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? The Holocaust. What's worse than the Holocaust? Finding two worms in your apple.

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A dyslexic man walks into a bra. It was hanging on a clothes line he didn't see, the fact that he was dyslexic is irellevant.

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so today, i was walking along, and i noticed that it was sunny outside.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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