Why didn't suzzana go to school on Monday?? Because it was Sunday...I lied about it being monday

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Why do I write Anit-jokes. Because I'm very bad at delevering good punchlines. They generally fall flat.

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What happened when Tim's house caught on fire? The fire department was contacted and they put the fire out.

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What's brown and sticky? Vomit.

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The average man ejaculates at 40mph, which is why its safer to hit a child at 30mph

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why did benny go to the 4th grade school nurse? he had a massive erection.

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What did the hose say to the sprinkler? I'm gonna squirt you.

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Your mom is so ignorant that she in completely unaware how the premature termination of QE2 in conjunction with a potential US credit downgrade could substantially impact her fixed income portfolios and hinder her ability to retire in the desired time frame.

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What's green and frolics in the forest? A flock of cucumbers.

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Sickman Fraud, cocaine snorting alshole... "Oh yeah mommy I love raping you so much... What where are you? This cocaine is really bad quality man! The effect was so short..." Your friendly r*pist neighborhood Moral Man: "Because since when do you really need cocaine... ...In order to rape your mother?"

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a white van was driving really slow and he stopped in front 3 children. "do you want some candy" the old man said. the kids took the candy and the old man drove away happily, knowing he made someones day.

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Why? Why not?

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Your mother is so fat that LOWERLOWEOROLWERLOWEH OIRH OWER IOWEJ OR OIJWE :JWEJKLR

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What was sandusky's role at penn state turned tight ends into wide receivers

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What goes up and down, up and down, up and down, forever? An insult to Newtonian physics.

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What do you call white people on a bench? NBA What do you call black people on a bench? RTA

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what's the worst way to fall asleep? sad. it makes you lose sleep.

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Do you want to hear a joke? Well you can't because you are reading this

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We was all sat down at the table ready to eat then Gary must've said something to Lucy because she just burst into tears and left the table.

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What's long and hard and full of semen? An erect penis at the climax of an orgasm.

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Your mumma's so fat she is fat

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What is Hellen Keller's favorite movie? Around the block in 80 days.

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how to turn invisable. eat yourself

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I'll take a Reuben, light sauce, and could you do Provolone instead of Swiss?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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