Why did the chicken cross the road? Because chickens are not very intelligent and was scared by a shadow. The chicken's survival instincts caused it to cross the road, away from the shadow. The chicken crossed the road safely, and is now happily pecking at worms.

Q: where was Johnny during the bombing? A: everywhere

Joesph Triphook.

One sunny Tuesday morning, Tom and his friends were outside playing at the park. Then, suddenly, a violent storm was rapidly approaching. It was recommended that everyone should seek shelter immediately.

A man wakes up after only one hour of sleep due to his insomnia. He starts to cry because his wife just passed away and his parents were recently killed in a car accident. The man gathers his composure, takes a shower, and drives to his minimum wage job. He was expelled from high school for an assault he didnt even commit and has no money to get an education. At work, he accidentally drops a box of valuable, fragile electronic parts and gets fired by his boss. He goes home to his dirty 1 bedroom apartment and contemplates suicide. He decides to wait as his favorite tv show is on. He turns on the tv to the news his show has been cancelled. The man, depressed, suicidal and alone, picks up his .22 and kills himself. There is no God.

what do you call an octopus with 9 tentacles? a male octopus

What did the man say to the other man? I have a large rod

Roses are red Violets are blue Some roses are white 72.4% of Americans are too

Why did Suzie fall of the swing? Because Suzie was a cucumber.

How do you know when you've ritten too many anti-jokes? When you answer your own question as a rhetorical device

What was the racist kid's least favorite ice cream flavor? Chocolate for an unrelated reason.

Q: How many Jewish people can fit in a four door sedan? A: 4, or possibly 5, depending on the sedan's optional seating, and depending on whether the gentleman are comfortable enough with each other to scoot closer to allow a 5th friend to join in.

What did Santa say when he fell down? Ouch

What did one fat chick say to the other fat chick? Who cares, they're fat.

What did the widow get for mother's day? A miscarriage

What do you call a Muslim on the moon? An astronaut

What did the blonde say when she fell out of a tree? Nothing, she shattered her trachea upon landing.

How do you get the neighborhood hoodlums to stop pushing you over in your wheelchair? Brutally murder their families in front of them.

Brain fart

Why did the chicken cross the road? He was attempting to get back to his farm.

why did the girl slap joe? he had a boner.

A man walks into a bar. He is promptly taken to the hospital where he finds out that he may have a concussion.

Why did Billy fall off the slide? Someone threw a refridgerator at his face.

What is square and grey? A grey square.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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