What's the difference between a Lawyer and a hooker? Job description, income, and an incredibly large list of other things.

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Women's rights

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Why did Suzy drop her ball? Because roughly 5 years ago she was part of a car crash violently tearing off both of her arms. Knock knock. Who's there. NOT SUZY!

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Why did the rooster cross the road? Because he wanted to prove he wasn't a chicken.

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What did the frog say when he heard his family was dead? "ribbit"

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A man brings his entire family in to meet a show producer. The producer says, "Okay, let's see what you got." The man then proceeds to lead his family through a variety of acts, including showcasing the proper way to drink English tea and how to dress for a polo match. When they finish, the producer asks, "And just what do you call your act?" To which the man replies, "The Aristocrats!"

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A man walks into a bar and says "ow"; he stepped on a nail sticking up through one of the floorboards. He then sues the bartender for a large sum of money because of the injury he sustained, and causes the bartender to lose everything he owns in order to pay off his debt.

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Why was the potatoe hot Cuz I cooked it

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Why did the woman fall off her bike?? Because someone threw a fridge at her!!!!!!

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I'm shy. The last shitbender. How do you fit babies in that bowl? Get a blender.

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Q: How do you make an mail man cry? A: Take his car and run over his family.

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a blonde, brunette and a red head are all goin to jump off a bridge and turn into something. the brunette jumps and says fish, and she turns into a fish. the red head says eagle and bacomes an eagle. the blonde gets a running start, but then trips on the way off and she says shit and turns into shit.

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The schoolboy said to the bus driver, this is my stop the bus driver replied "no, we have a while to go yet"

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Whats black and is on sale in shops? Blackberries.

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What do you call Charlie Sheen when he's on drugs? Charlie Sheen.

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roes are red violets are blue we have nothing in common so baby were through

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Why is Henrik so AWESOME? Cos HE just IS!!!!

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Harold Camping and the May 21st 2011 rapture.....

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Hi

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Roses are red Violets are T I T S I like T I T S T I T S

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I'll take a Reuben, light sauce, and could you do Provolone instead of Swiss?

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Why was the boy put on his socks? So he wouldn't get blisters.

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Why can't Hellen Keller drive? Because she's a woman.

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Q. Why do cheetahs run so fast? A. Because their bodies allow them to.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops