A dinosaur walks into the bar, everyone panics in fear and confusion because it is a dinosaur and it's weird.

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Why did the bartender kick out the three jews at midnight? Because the bar closes at 11.

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Why did a boy get slapped in the hand? A; because he had it in the persons face

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Why doesn't the little boy talk to his mom? Because she smells like barbecue sauce.

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What's the difference between a BMW and a pile of dead babies? There isn't a BMW in my garage.

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Q: Why did the man die of starvation??? A: He didn't eat for 3 days!!

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THER ONCE WAS A jueny WITH A TEN FOOT WENNY AND HE WENT TO SHOW IT TO THE LADY NEXT DOOR SHE THOUGHT IT WAS A SNKE SO SHE HIT IT WITH A RAKE AND NOW ITS ONLY FIVE FOOT FOUR!

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What do Justin Bieber and corn have in common? They are both fruits. Except for the corn.

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient ability. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? I don't know. Me either. Well, later. Later.

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what do you get when you combine an astronaut, a microwave and a bathtub? A suicide investigation

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Whats worse than going to jail for the rest of your life? Going to jail naked for the rest of your life.

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What do you call three black guys in a bar? A bar.

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How do u wake up lady gaga You go into her room and yell at her

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roses are red violets are blue im not good at poems so fuck you too.

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How do you make something disappear from your hand? Throw it somewhere that's out of sight,

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Q. How do you make your neighbor mad? A. Run his kids over.

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Why did the boy fall out of the tree? This is no time to make insensative jokes you dick, Billy's on a hospital bed.

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Whats black, blue, and red all over? A man who has just been severally beaten.

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Three men walk into a gay bar, and have a great time because they're all of consensual age and brought condoms for safe sex.

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men's rights activists

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some weirdo nerd was just convicted of a hit and run Just kidding. All he did was suffocate your dad with a whoopee cusion.

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Why did the black guy buy a jug of grape soda Because he was thirsty

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What is white and smells like wood? White painted wood

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops