A man walks into a psychiatrists office with a banana in his ear, The psychiatrist says, why do you have that banana in your ear. The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist says, "I said, 'Why do you have that banana in your ear?" The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist shouts, "I SAID, WHY DO YOU HAVE THAT BANANA IN YOUR EAR?" The man says, "Sorry, I can't hear you, I'm deaf." (props- Marty Smith)

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How do you make a plumber cry? You kill his kids.

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Why did the patient die of aids disorder? Butt sex. Lots and lots of butt sex.

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What do you call a cat without a face ? - Kitty !

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A man buys cocaine from a shady dealer in an alley. He then goes home and experiments with it and other chemicals, and later on invents Coca Cola

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Roses are stools, Violets are bums, sugar is knit, thank you, LSD.

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Waitress: Would you like to have a drink? Customer: (Looks at the drink's menu) Hmmmm... What are my choices? Waitress: Yes and no.

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How do you kill a Jewish person? Like any other person, they are like any other person of any race and religion.

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Why did the slut suck a dick? Because she's a slut.

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How do you make a mime talk? There are many ways. I prefer a baseball bat with a nail through it.

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How many rats does it take to screw in a light bulb? Two. But they have to be really small.

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I Couldn't afford a hair cut... so i purpposely contracted HIV

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Why did Jimmy fall of his tractor? Because Jimmy doesn't have any arms or legs...Why doesn't Jimmy have any arms and legs? Cause Jimmy is a potato.

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Asked by the court barber how he wanted his hair cut, the king replied: ‘In silence.

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What do you call Rosa Parks? One bitchy negro. Just kidding she was a visionary for human rights, now you can't dislike this cause you'll be saying that Rosa Parks wasn't a visionary, take that blacks.

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What's invisible and smells like carrots? Rabbit farts.

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What's worse than Christmas alone? Pedophiles.

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A black man, an asian man, and a gay man walk into a bar. What do they do? They mourn the loss of their dead friend.

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I like school Said no one ever.

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What's the difference between a black man and a bench? The bench is an object and the black man is a human being.

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Whats funny about a guy with no legs? I bought him a wheelchair.

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How do you stop a black person from drowning?.. Take your foot off his head

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knock knock? who's there.......... MEEEE :D hehe

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why was the black man on the bus? cause he needed to get to work

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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