Knock knock. Knock knock. Knock knock. I'm hammering nails. Knock knock.

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A duct walks into a bar. The writer meant to write duck and then proceed to make a clever joke but instead a typo was made and a very unlikely occurence was writtern about considering air passages are not capable of walking and would most likely already be in the ceiling of the bar as too bring fresh air into the bar is important.

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Guess what? I like trains.

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How many wheelchair users does it take to change a light bulb? - They are not physically capable

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My friend was waving a stick around and yelling out spells, so walked up to him and asked "You want to be Harry Potter, don't you?" He replied excitedly "Yeah!!" So i killed his parents and locked him under the stairs.

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What's awesome about going to a no-pants party? Getting stabbed 2 times.

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What's the difference between a black man and a bench? The bench isnt going anywhere.

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Irish man English man and a Scottish man all in a plane they jump out then they land

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i just cant stand up to cripple jokes

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what do u call a lesbian dinosaur? lickalotopuss

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Why did the sloth fall out of the tree? Because sloths often confuse their arm with a branch, grab on and fall to their deaths.

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What did the Irishman say to the German? "Sorry, do you have the time?"

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Bob: I have a funny knock knock joke, but you have to start it. Joe: Ok. Knock Knock. Bob: Who's there? Joe: Uhhhhhhh Bob: Exactly.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? The chicken had been running in the road's direction for some time, and continued travelling in that direction despite the road being in the way.

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Your mother is so fat that she's more prone to cardiovascular disease than other people who stick to the proper BMI or body mass index

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What is brown and can't get an erection? Poo

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Q:What did Batman say to Robin just before they got into the Batmobile? A:"Robin get in the Batmobile"

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What is worse than an 11 year old getting raped You getting caught

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Whats green has 4 legs and would kill someone if it fell out of a tree??? A pool table.....

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What's worse than burning your tongue drinking hot chocolate? Being shanked by a homeless man.

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A baby seal walks into a club.

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"Good Morning, I'm Dr. Pepper" "Like the drink?" "Huh... yes... just like the drink" Would you mind to sit right here Mr..... "Nike" "Oh, just like the shoes" "How do you dare!"

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roses are red violets are blue i'm allergic to pollen achoo

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Have you heard of the lawnmower joke? No neither have I

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops