A mushroom walks into a bar. The bartender says "We don't serve your kind here." The mushroom says, "What? I'm a fungi." The bartender replies, "Exactly. That's a health hazard. The health department already gave two strikes and if I lose the bar my wife will divorce me."

thumb_up thumb_down +10

your sister has 1 boob thats funny

thumb_up thumb_down +10

What do u do when u hear about a smart Blonde. Cant think of anything? Exactly

thumb_up thumb_down +10

What do you call a dragon with no wings? a dragon with no wings :(

thumb_up thumb_down +10

What do you call man with no limbs or a head? Your neighbor.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

What is the answer to life, universe and everything? Nothing.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

So a woman walks out of a kitchen, she is instantly mauled by a bear.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Why's Jeds head so big? Curley wurly.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

What did the blonde say when she fell out of a tree? Nothing, she shattered her trachea upon landing.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

What do you do when a blonde throws a grenade at you? Pull the pin and throw it back at her

thumb_up thumb_down +10

AARgh my name is AWsaing the nawant of the where of amzai Giant rabbit bunny

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Thats so awesome, I was totally not not going to tell you and when I saw I did not not type it I totally did it anyways, but why did it last even though stuff timed out? I am like so wet.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

What do you call a white guy? A caucasion man.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

What can I say, besides, the media is fighting one another now, people do have more freedom, religion is losing the grip on people, and yeah the world may be a bit grim right now, but people have chosen their own direction in life, and that is going wherever the most corrupt ones in society tell them to. And that was never different, I am not saying that you are not doing a good job, I am saying that the underground society failed, we where idealists, then we where branded criminals, without a shred of proof, I have not lost myself, and you have not lost you, why save the rest from what they enjoy?

thumb_up thumb_down +10

What did the star say to the asteroid? Nothing, astral bodies can't talk, you dipshit.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

I wondered why the piano was getting bigger. Then it hit me... I'm sorry I have visual agnosia

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Why was the 2-year-old girl found dead in the swamp? Her mom was Casey Anthony.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

I was just thinking of how much i laughed at the challenger launch.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Five little monkeys jumping on the bed One fell off and bumped his head Mama called the doctor an the doctor said, "I am calling Child Protection Services."

thumb_up thumb_down +10

how do you make kindergarteners unhappy? you taze them.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

What did Batman say to robin before they got in the batmobile? "Robin, get in the batmobile!"

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Yo mama so ugly she's ridiculed daily and has frequent suicidal thoughts.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

If your riding your bicycle down the railroad tracks and your wings fall off how much icecrea does it take to fill a upside down doghouse

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Fishing rods are cool This haiku does not make sense Lumpy Space Princess

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops