Knock Knock, Whos there? a baby nailed to the wall Orgasim

whats green and lives in the water

Why couldn't the melons get married? As gay cantaloupes, their jurisdiction didn't allow for same-sex marriage.

What do you say to a man with no legs at a bus stop.. How you getting on.

Actually, Ylvis had a dog named Say. When he peed in the studio one evening, Ylvis said, "What the fuck, Say?"

What happens if a Muslim leaves their bag on a bus? They quickly return onto the bus and get it.

Why did the chicken cross the road? He did it for fitness.

What stops a train? A missile

A farmer hears a knock at the door on a rainy night. He opens the door and welcomes an attractive young man in. The farmer gets his budding teenage daughter to fetch the man a towel. He dries himself off, thanks them both, and goes to bed. He's gone before anyone else wakes up and leaves a fifty on the table.

What's the difference between Republicans and Democrats? There is a series of boxes which one can choose to check on a ballot, officially registering an individual with a certain party. Available parties include the Green Party, The American Communist Party, The Republican Party, and the Democratic Party among others. Republicans choose to check the Republican box, Democrats choose to check the Democrat box. Also Republicans are closet homosexuals and Democrats are terrorists.

What do you call Batman with a knife in his chest? Dead

Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't. Traffic was too backed-up so the chicken took a different route.

What's fat and round and has a ballsack nose? Mr Chicken

What is the difference between a duck? A motorcycle because vests don't have sleeves.

What did the chicken say to the.... nevermind

Q: what's red and blue and covered in piss? A: everything. I'm so sorry.

Why did the chicken cross the playground? Because he was looking for other chickens because he has no friends and he got bullied when he was in 12th grade. He got picked on because he was sledding down his hill in his backyard and he accidentally scraped one side of his face on ice and started bleeding. The next day his classmates started calling him two face.

why are there so many peadofiles in the world? sexy kids.

What's long and blackand goes all night? night time

Why was the boy crying? Because he had a frog stapled to his face

You can pick your friends, and you can pick your nose, but you can't eat your friends Nose it is!

What did the Goldfish say to the Black man? Nothing, because Goldfish do not have human-like vocal cords and therefore the Goldfish cannot speak.

Pineapple.

Whats funnier than 1 dead baby? 2 Dead babies

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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