your momma is so fat she eats a lot of things

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whats worse that finding your having sex with your long lost sister? having sex with your long lost brother

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Why did the kids put pirahnas in Mr. Hermann's fish tank? So they could eat him.

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a giraffe walks into a bakery, "can I have 101 brown loafs please?" the baker answers: "hmm I've got only 100 loafs is that ok too?" the giraffe says: "why the hell would I need a 100 loafs?!"

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what did the addidas sign say to the nike sign? I'm all in

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Wow you look beautiful in that picture..... Let me see your tits. Sorry, I thought I was still texting.

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Why couldn't the Egyptian pharaoh solve the Rubik's Cube? He didn't know how.

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How do you make a dog say meow? Freeze it and put it through a woodchipper. (MEROWRRRR)

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why did jim die? he had cancer why did jim have no hair? it started to fall out when he was 20 and now he is bald at 30 years old

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Did you hear about the circus fire? Yes, apparently there were no casualties but all their props and equipment were destroyed, which will set the company back financially, even with the insurance.

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What's funny about Antijokes.com? Everything

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Why do bats fly in circles? They're mentally retarded.

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How much wood could a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could Chuck Norris? All of it.

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How do you get a black man out of a tree? You provide him with a ladder of varying length depending on his height in the tree and hold the ladder to ensure that it is stable and safe while he is climbing down. If he his very high in the tree then it may be helpful to call the fire department for assistance in getting him down.

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stephen hawking walks into a bar...

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What's the worst way to say you want to break up? Kill her dog.

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One day a object is flying overhead in a city and a man in a crowd of pedestrians yells, "It's a bird!" another man yells, "It's a plane!" No one else says anything as they stare at the two men that had become so excited about a possibly seeing a bird or an airplane.

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What did one fat chick say to the other fat chick? Who cares, they're fat.

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How do you make Lady Gaga sad? You kill her family.

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A blonde and a brunette walk into a job interview. The brunette gets the job because she is more qualified and has more experience.

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why did the pyromaniac burn down the house? because he is a pyronaniac, he derives pleasure from burning things.

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why navy seals ? they shot osoma bin laden in the face...... multiple times

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he had legs.

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What happened after Will Ferrell took a dump? He wiped his ass and flushed.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops