A mercenary was sent from the US to kill a terrorist leader. He was captured by the terrorists but wouldn't give away any information. They beat him, shocked him, cut him, and punched him in a dark room with a light beaming right down on him like a spotlight. It was a grueling five long days until they said "We know you have the information we want, tell us or you will die!" The mercenary sat in silence. They took out a gun and pointed it to his head. The mercenary then broke down and told the terrorists the information they wanted to hear. The terrorists then shot him to death.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Why was Timmy so unpopular at school? Because he caught aids of his pet rock

thumb_up thumb_down -4

what is green and has wheels grass i lied about the wheels

thumb_up thumb_down -4

How do you help a black person find a job ? Tell them places that are hiring.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

A dyslexic man walks into a bar. He than orders some drinks.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

What do you hear when you put your foot on a man's ear? A man saying, "WTF are you doing?!"

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Why couldn’t the bicycle stand up on its own? The kickstand was broken and the child whom of which owned the bicycle no longer had the need for training wheels.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

A white man, a black man, and a brown man are all in an elevator. The white man laughs "this is like the start to a racist joke or something." The other two men strangle him because he is white.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

when life throws you lemons you should probably get out of the way because it will hurt

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Why was Mary's turkey dry on Thanksgiving dinner? Because she left it in the oven too long.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

i actually read the terms of service before i posted this

thumb_up thumb_down -4

A man named Jake walks into a bar. The bartender says hi jake... The End

thumb_up thumb_down -4

why did the mexican work for a lawn care service I don't know why don't you ask him

thumb_up thumb_down -4

I don't really like holocaust jokes because my grandpa was in it. Yeah he was drunk and fell off his guard tower.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

How many fairies does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Two, but I don't know how they got in there.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

What's the difference between a Lamborgini and 100 dead babies? I don't have a Lambo in my garage.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Q. How many grains of rice can you fit in an egg? A. Fire extinguisher.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

batman has diarrhea

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Q. If you're paddling up river and you lose three tires, how many pancakes does it take to cover a doghouse? A. Purple because ice cream has no bones.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

How do you drown a blonde? A: Drowing any person no matter the color of their hair is conpletely illegal and considered murder.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Why did Johnny close the door on Sally's face? Because Johnny is a dick.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Three men are walking, the first one walks into a bar. He has a couple of drinks because he is depressed. He drives home, drunk, and dies in a car accident. His wife finds out and hangs herself.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Who let the dogs out? The burglar, he broke the door and they ran out.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

What did the politician say to the bank robber? "Were both robbers"

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops