A lady in a bank was asked by the clerk to round the sum she wanted to raise from her account. She rounded it several times, but the clerk continued to insist that the sum needs to be rounded. She left the bank confused, with a coupon consisting of completely rounded sum of 691, 88$. Next day she returned with a coupon with a rounded sum of 690,88$. The clerk asked again the lady to round the sum. The lady started helplessly to cry and said she had rounded is already with a harp, and couldn't make it round anymore, she even removed the sharp 1 from the sum.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

Knock Knock Who's there? Ash Oh hey Ash, I was expecting you, come on in!!

thumb_up thumb_down -26

A Priest, a Rabbi and a Shaman walk into a bar. The Bartender looks at them and says "What is this a Joke?"

thumb_up thumb_down -26

Why was Joseph Kony at a primary school ? It was 3 o'clock and his children had just finished a long hard day learning to read and right and it was his turn to pick them up after him and misses Kony developed a schedule one late night after the odd glass of wine or two.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

q. What's the worst thing about your family a. There related to you

thumb_up thumb_down -26

mmm i love marble bumhole

thumb_up thumb_down -26

Just think...there are 7 billion people in the world...so that's 14 billion orgasms!

thumb_up thumb_down -26

An englishman, a scotsman and an irishman walk into a bar together. They sit down at the bar, and the barman says, "What is this, some kind of joke?!"

thumb_up thumb_down -26

Why do ducks have flat feet? To stomp out forest fires Why do elephants have flat feet? To stomp out flaming ducks

thumb_up thumb_down -26

Why did Kallum come to Getaway? Because he ran out of hats

thumb_up thumb_down -26

KKK: Hey i was just comming over here to invite you to a church gathering me and my buddies are having later on tonight, and afterwards we are going to have a big bon-fire to fire up our spirits. Black guy: OK sounds great. White people sure are nice now-a-days.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

What is the difference between a pillow and a rock The rock could hert you.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

What's the difference between getting hit by a car and being struck by lightning? Impossible to tell, they are 2 entirely different circumstances with limited certainties.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

Life gives you lemons you make lemonade. What do you do when life gives you melons... youre skrewed.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

If a blonde and a brunette are both falling out of a building, which one will hit the ground first? The brunette, she jumped first.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

what duz 69 mean? its a number duhhhhhhh

thumb_up thumb_down -26

How do you stop a clown from laughing? Hit him in the face with an axe

thumb_up thumb_down -26

Whats worse than stubbing your toe? Sandy hook

thumb_up thumb_down -26

Homo say what?

thumb_up thumb_down -26

guess what>? your mum lol

thumb_up thumb_down -26

?"i'm so turned on right now." - horny light bulb

thumb_up thumb_down -26

brock has small hands for a small job

thumb_up thumb_down -26

Why did the blonde turn down prostitution? She knows it is illegal and has better moral values than that.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

Do you want to hear a joke? Well you can't because you are reading this

thumb_up thumb_down -26

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops