What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Getting a girl pregnant.

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why did the man have a hole in his face? because syphillis had eaten a hole in it

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A duck walks into the bar, buys a beer, steals your woman, wins a bar fight, pistol whips a police officer, departs and shouts Aflac

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What did the black man say to the white man? "Hi"

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70% of heroin addicts die at some point in their life.

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whats worse than 10 dead babies nailed to one tree? 10 living babies nailed to one tree

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Roses are red, violets are blue; So give me head, or I queue you!

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How much do polar bears weigh? Between 800 and 1600 pounds

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Say, "I have a really nice knock knock joke, but you have to start." To someone. They say knock knock You say who's there! and walk away.

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Why did the teenager turn in his work on time? He chose not to procrastinate.

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*Dubstep* CHEW CHEW CHEW CHEW CHEW BWAB BWAB

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Q : What is the similarity between me and my friend? A : We both are crazy

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Why did the angry kid press the button? The button said "press here angry kid"

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A Mexican man, an American man, and an Italian man go to a bridge. The mexican said "we have too much of this in our country!" and throws pasta into the water. The Mexican man says "we have to much of this in out country!" and throws a taco into the water. The American throws in the Mexican man and says "we have to much of these in our country!"

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A man walks into a bar, the bartender says, "why the long face?" the man replies, "my wife has terminal cancer and has been given 2 weeks to live."

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"Spell 'horse'" "H-O-U-Z-E" "No, that's incorrect. You failed the spelling test, you stupid fool."

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You had ONE job. Unfortunately, it wasn't enough to support your dying wife and ill child.

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Barbara Streisand

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There was a golfer at the field where people usually golf. he had a golf club. so did the man next to him. The man i spoke of first hit the guy that was next to him with a golf club. Why? because he was angry at the man for shoving socks down his daughters throat and extracted her eyes with a melon scooper. This should not be humorous, the girl got blood and eye juice on her fathers new shoes when she came home.

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What do you call a spider with no legs? A spider.

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how do you starve a black man? hide his food stamps in his work boots.

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HOLY COW!

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How many electricians does it take to change a light bulb? 1

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Q: What did the prostitute ask the officer? A: Where were you stationed? I have a lot of respect for our boys in the Middle East.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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