-Hey cute blonde! -I'm not blonde.. -Nor are you cute.

What was Helen Keller's favourite colour? None, due her disability she was unable to see colours...

Q:How do you sleep with Paris Hilton? A:You don't. she got herpes.

Why did the little boy chase after his ball? Because it rolled away

What did George Washington tell his men before they got on their horses? Men get on your horses.

Knock Knock. Who's there? Doctor. Doctor Who? Doctor Watson - I'm here to see your little sister who is currently terminally ill and every second is of vital importance. Therefore this exchange of words is only worsening the already terrible situation that we find ourselves in. Please open the door.

Why couldn't the man walk? He lost his legs when he stepped on a land mine in Afghanistan.

Knock knock: Who's there? Guy in the doghouse. Guy in the doghouse who? WILL YOU LET ME OUT OF HERE?!?

telling real jokes on anti-joke is a form of anti jokes

Sugar is sweet. Plums are too. Prison rape isn't funny either.

Chicken

You wanna know what's totally out of this world? The moon.

the redsox

Contrary to the popular saying, "An apple a day keeps the doctor away," if you get cancer there's nothing an apple can do...

Roses are red, Violets are rare because of the irreversible damage to our ecosystem in recent years.

what do you get when a penguin has a heart atack pengatack

What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

Ask me what my favorite color is. What's you favorite color? Blue.

What do you call a cat that plays football? Weird.

Please ignore this statement.

Why do turtles walk slow? They are physically incapable of walking fast.

Two whales are in a bar. One says, "whoaohaoahwoahwahoh" The other says, "Go home, Frank. You're drunk."

A horse walks into a bar. He politely holds the door for a young woman.

What's worse then finding a worm in ur apple? Nothing it sucks and it's a waste of an apple

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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