Why did the short man fall down the stairs? He got shot in the face with an assault rifle.

Knock Knock Who's there? The KGB Yes, How can I help? We are looking for a local serbian mobster who we believe to be hiding in this Village have you seen this man. No I cant say I have. Sorry Well thank you for your time and if you notice anything please try and let the local Police know.

What did the boyfriend give his girlfriend for Valentine's Day? AIDS

My daughter's so smart, that instead of texting K, she writes Potassium.

how do you punish helen keller? leave the plunger in the toilet.

How do you make an elephant float? Who cares?

www.xnxx.com

Yo' Mama is so fat, her driver's license says, "picture continued on other side."

Lambos are red Tuxedos are Blue The cat is out of the bag Shit, we're all gonna die in helll

how do u make a baby cry? you shouldnt. Stop thinking of ways to make a kid cry... asshole.

Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because it would be hazardous to other motorists well-being.

i got 99 problems.... and aids is one

whats on object, almost tube like that squirts thick white liquid from the top elmer's glue

Hey guess whats funny? Matthew Mcconaughey Oh wait, never mind

Why was everyone afraid of Nick Morton? Because he had AIDS

What happened to the man taking a shit? An unfortunate drop of water splashed back onto his arse

Two guys walk into a bar.... OUCH

what did batman say to robin to get him into the car? Get in the car

What do you put in a toaster? Bread, or sometimes a small penis.

Snake: YES muahaha Eve eat the fruit from the three of wisdom muahahaha! Why do you not share with Adam? Muahahaha! Snake: Why is nothing happening? Then the sky opened and a heavenly voice spoke: "Well as long as none eats fruit from the three of KNOWLEDGE... Hmm, I better get rid of it altogether..." Snake: FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU!

yo mama's so fat, that he doctors are slightly worried that she may be suffering from type 2 diabetes.

Knock Knock Who's there? The IRS. You've been convicted of tax evasion.

A: Doctor doctor help me! B: Sorry, I'm not actually a doctor, stop calling me that!

What's long, hard, and contains semen? A submarine.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...