What does "Ford" stand for? Nothing. It's the name of the company founder, not an acronym.

Your momma is so dumb, she failed the IQ test.

A dog got into a gingerbread house. She ate some and brought some to the basement it got on the couch!

Michael J Fox may not be able to draw a perfect circle but he sure can jerk off like a champ

What's brown and sticky??? A brown stick

One sunny Tuesday morning, Tom and his friends were outside playing at the park. Then, suddenly, a violent storm was rapidly approaching. It was recommended that everyone should seek shelter immediately.

What make's a constuction worker drop's his hammer? MC Hammer moves.

Question: What do you call a Black person who cooks food at a fried chicken restaurant? Answer: A chef

How did the mouse die It was eaten by a cat How did the cat die It jumped into the bathtub and drowned

How do you get the neighborhood hoodlums to stop pushing you over in your wheelchair? Brutally murder their families in front of them.

What would you say if you girlfriend got hit by a train? Trick question, trains don't go through kitchens!

Your mom is so fat that she actually had a pretty hard time finding a husband.

A family walks into a talent agency. It's a father, mother, son, daughter and dog. The father says to the talent agent, "We have a really amazing act. You should represent us." The agent says, "Sorry, I don't represent family acts. They're a little too cute." The mother says, "Sir, if you just see our act, we know you would want to represent us." The agent says, "OK. OK. I'll take a look." The father begins by juggling some balls. The mother pulls out her harmonica and begins playing "Dixie". The children and dog try and get the dog to jump through a hoop. For the longest time, the agent just sits in silence. Finally, he manages, "That's a hell of an act. What do you call it?" And the father says, "The Aristocrats!"

A apple a day is good for your overall health and you should schedule check ups with your doctor to maintain good health and avoid seeing him everyday.

Some of the people on this site who write these "jokes" are complete morons. Many of them believe that racism, sexism, and spamming is hilarious. Each one of them is a ****ing dumbass and needs to be removed from this site. Racism is not funny, people are murdered because of it! Those who think that they are being funny by insulting others need to get a life and stop ruining this site for others who want to read good jokes free of racism. Africans, Hispanics, Jews, and everyone else deserves better than to be insulted like this. And I'm a white, so take that you racist whores! I apologize for those of you who have good humor that have to read this, but those other jerks need to be told off.

What did the man say when he saw a giant herd of elephants coming? "Look! There's a giant herd of elephants coming!"

What did silly Billy with no arms get for Christmas ? Gloves.. why did silly billy fall off the swing? He got hit by a microwave.. Why did silly sally fall off the swing? She had no arms.. Knock Knock Whos there? Not sally..

What's the difference between communism and race mixing? Zey come for our blood, but drown in zeir ovn!!!!!

What did Santa say when he fell down? Ouch

Day turn night. Dreaming is now true . Turn on your flashlight, slenderman is behind you.

3 guys are walking in the woods there are 3 paths they each take a path. the first path lead to a shed that said blowjobs 25 cents the second path lead to the same place after they all made it threw the first guy said he got a blowjob so dose the second guy. the third guy said i made 50 cents

What's worse than one cat stuck in a tree? Getting raped

I got 99 problems and they're all related to long history of drug abuse

1 out of every 3 relationships someone is cheating, I wonder if it was my wife or my girlfriend

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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