Little Miss Muffet sat on a tuffet, but she had anal hemorrhaging so it really hurt

Hobos are like Obama they want change.

Why was the little girl sad? Why???? Because an elephant stamped on her, and shat on her.

What do you call a black man on the moon?? Never going to happen

What starts with F and ends with uck? Fire truck

When life gives you Live Aid, celebrate the fact that you've just gone back in time 27 years and somehow cheated death temporarily.

my wifes star sign is cancer, kinda ironic how she died really..... she got eaten by a giant crab.

what does lady gaga and a vacuum have in common? nothing. lady gaga is a human and the other is a house hold item.

Dumbledore dies.

why did the cow say baaaaa ? it was a stupid cow

What is black and hangs on a rope next to a rebel flag in my back yard? A tire swing for my redneck kids to swing on.

What's the difference between a BMW and a pile of dead babies? There isn't a BMW in my garage.

Roses are red,violets are blue, i love the colour red and green but its a pitty because im not so keen.

My name is Dave I like poems Microwave ummmmmmmmm (enter word that rhymes with poems)

Why do so many people troll on the internet? Because Hitler was awesome!

Whats worse than getting a papercut on the side of your finger? Being shotgunned in the ass

What is green and fuzzy and would kill you if it fell out of a tree? An elephant I lied!

What's worse than getting raped by a duck? Getting raped by two ducks.

when geese fly in a v formation, why is one side always longer then the other? Because you touch yourself at night...

Whats the difference between a black guy at the beach, and a black guy at the zoo? One is at the beach, and one is at the zoo.

Why did Jimmy lay down? Because he was tired

why was the little girl crying? because i raped her.

How do you get into USA from mexico? Climb a fence

How do you keep a black man from hanging around your tree? You cut the rope.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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