What would Osama Bin Laden be doing if he were alive today? Drowning

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What did hitler said to the chinese? Thank you for continuing my legacy.

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What is green and fuzzy and would kill you if it fell out of a tree? An elephant I lied!

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Why did the Mexican cross the border? He was hoping to achieve greater economic prosperity and well-being for his family. penis.

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What's the difference between roast beef and pea soup? You can't drown babies in roast beef.

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A horse walks into a bar. The bartender asks, "Why the long face?" The horse replies " My daughter just died of leukemia."

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Q:what do you get when you get when you cross a dog and a human A: a human-dog hybrid with AIDS

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A man walks into a bar. The bartender asks what he'd like to drink. The man pulls out his gun, shoots the surprised bartender, and proceeds to execute all the patrons of the bar and finally commit suicide. A post-mortem identification of the man identifies him as a victim of childhood sexual abuse and a diagnosed schizophrenic. There is a nice funeral for all the victims and the media respectfully minimizes exposure of the event.

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...................__ ............./´¯/'...'/´¯¯`·¸ ........../'/.../..../......./¨¯\ ........('(...´...´.... ¯~/'...') .........\.................'...../ ..........''...\.......... _.·´ ............\..............( BroFist

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Whats the difference between Osama and Obama? The S is replaced with a B.

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Ask me if I am a Truck Are You a Truck No

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roses are red, violets are blue, im a bad poet, text me. LMFAO

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5 Italian guys from Long Island

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roses are red violets are blue show me your bed i wanna fuck you oh and roses are red violets are blue nice tits.

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Why did the father leave work early on his son's birthday? He was rushed to the hospital after facing a severe heart attack due to a history of cardiovascular disease in his family.

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- i send you a friend request on facebook - okay

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The global news

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Colin Fry backwards is yrF niloC

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Why did the child say he had been a ubused. Answer: because he had been.

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Have you ever tried ethiopian food Neither have they

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What's so similar about a zombie and a black man? They are both almost human.

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You want to know something bad? A bag of dead babies. You wanna know something worse? One was still alive. You wanna know something even worse? He ate his way out. You wanna know something even worse? He went back for seconds.

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What did the man say to the young, blond athletic girl walking by? "Hi."

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What is small, cries a lot, and moves at high speeds? A baby stapled to a car.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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