What do you get if you put a baby in a blender? An Erection

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What did modern scientists say to Einstein? Neurtinos travel faster than the speed of light! :)

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How do you get clean dishes? You wash them.

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Thanks, I admire your sincerity, and I am happy to see that I got a lot more in common with you, than with well, my nerdy and geeky friends, which are not reading this here and now unless they are going against their orders and messing up their own work schedule. I just want you to know that I have fallen in love with you Nero, and if that is a problem for you, please let me know ASAP.

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What's sad about 2 black men driving off a cliff? They were my friends.....

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knock, knock Who's there? Statefarm... and we are always gonna be there for you

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Why was Armando unable to be found by his friend Ashley ? A: They both were murdered 7 years ago, and bodies are unable to do anything if they lost their soul that was with that body.

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What succeeds most of the time? The population of a field with grass.

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Jesse's mom is so god damn fat that it is an extreme danger just being around her

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How many people does it take to screw in a lightbulb? One to drop it and die of gas poisoning.

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Did you see Stevie wonders house? Neither did he.

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What happens when a fat guy falls ? Ohio has another earthquake.

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THE LOVE SHACK IS A LITTLE OLD PLACE WHERE WE CAN GET TOGETHER!

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one time at band camp there was a guy guess what he played? no one knows

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Bob: "Did you eat my sandwich?" Alex: "I am your sandwich."

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What is worse than you commiting suicide? the many years of mourning and threapy your loved ones may have to go though

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What is the difference between a baby and a tree? Its not illegal to hit one with an axe

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What do you call a 9 year old with no friends? A Sandyhook survivor.

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Nero? As In Nero7? Septimus? Where you not killed during the raid? I read you got tortured and killed by your own out of mercy.

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The duck didn't cross the road.

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Why was King Triton mad at Ariel? Her grades were under the C.

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I'm pretty sure this site has been taken over by 12 year olds... None of these are funny

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flashback 2010 bears vs. packers vs. bears- why did'nt the packers want to go to soldier field? because they didnt want to pass another 6 flags!

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What's the difference between a red shirt and a blue shirt? one is red and one is blue

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops