a chicken walks into a cafe, where it is swiftly caught, killed, plucked ,and served with stuffing and all for £5.99

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The Labour Party.

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how did the homeless man die? He got stabbed

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ARGH! LADY THAT SNAKE BIT MY PECKER! YOU HAVE TO SUCK THE POISON OUT NOW! OMG SURE, err...Meh, thats not a poisonous snake... Oh... dammit! I mean phew! Ouch ouch ouch!

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Why did the blind man get hit by a bus? Because his seeing-eye dog was distracted by a squirrel and ran off, leaving the man in the middle of the cross-walk in heavy traffic.

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What's big, hard, in the water, and isolated? Shutter Island

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I can prove I'm a psychic - this post is going to receive a lot of dislikes.

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Which came first the chicken or the egg? The egg. Chickens evolved from their pre-historic ancestors who each laid an egg with a slight genetic mutation until one egg contained what is now classified as the modern chicken.

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A blind man walk in to a bar... He then yells a 4 letter explative, backs up, and walks around it.

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Roses are red, bushes are red, trees are red....i set your garden on fire.

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A car enters a curve. An ice-cream man pops out from a manhole and throws a pine cone to the car.

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a rabbi and a priest walk into a wall

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What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? A Jew is a person who adheres to the Jewish faith and claims a cultural or ancestral connection to the Jewish people, and a pizza is an oven-baked, flat, disc shaped bread usually topped with tomato sauce and mozzarella and then a selection of meats, depending on taste and culture.

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p lkl

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What did Jesus say to Moses? Jesus isn't real. Moses replied, "Do you think I'm stupid? I'm talking to him!"

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How do you get Pikachu on a Bus? Pikachu Is A Fictional Charecter.

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What Happened to the man who married a money? He contracted HIV

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The Blonde walked into a wall.

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A tree falls in the woods and no one is around to hear it... Fall on top of a woman and crush her to death

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Why did the welshman cross the road? To violently hump sheep.

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Do you smell that? Sex and candy?

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What's long hard and black A drain pipe

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My girlfriend says i cant finish a sentence properly dripping horse cum fetus rape.

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Three Jews are hiding under the floorboards. One of them makes a noise and a second Jew elbows him so he'll keep quiet. They are heard and are all caught. It's now their turn to seek because they are playing Hide n' Seek.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops