What's better then finding an apple in the Holocaust? Finding a tunnel under the fence.

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In soviet Russia...things are different

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Q1: How do you get an elephant to laugh? A1: Tell it a joke. Q2: How do you get a cow to laugh? A2: Cows can't laugh.

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Guy 1: What the shit is that car? Guy 2: Its not a car. It's an alfa romeo

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Why did little Timmy scrape his knee? He was launched off of an aircraft carrier.

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A group of black people are arrested for murder, what do you need? A better prison.

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Your Mama is so old, that she is probrably going to die pretty soon.

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A Jew, a Russian, and a Turk walk into a bar. The Jew asks, "Can I get a glass of Manischewitz?" The bartender serves him. The Russian asks, "Can I get a shot of vodka?" The bartender serves him. The Turk then asks, "Can I get a Turkish coffee?" The bartender looks at him, confused, and says, "Sorry, but this is a bar. Unfortunately we don't serve coffee."

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Wanna know my life in a nutshell? Well you can't. Life is an inanimate object an will therefore not fit inside anything, let alone a nutshell.

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What did the straw say to the other straw? We are both straws just kidding they cant talk

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I don't drink. I'm not 21.

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What do you call a blonde with great maths skills? A smart person with blonde hair.

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Why did the black man steal purple kool-aid, chicken and watermelon? Because it was the birthday of his 8 year old daughter with autism and she loves purple kool-aid, chicken and watermelon and he was very poor and wanted to make his little girl happy for once.

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Why did Jerry Sandusky appeal his conviction? Because the judge wrongly considered inadmissible evidence.

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Roses are Red Violets are Blue If you think this is gonna rhyme, You're dead wrong.

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what did the history teacher say to his class? Get your books out.

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Watch me whip, watch me nae nae

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What did peter griffin say to the black guy? Oh you are black.

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Chuck Norris tried to return some jeans to Target and when they didn't give him his money he kickeed them in the face.

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What did the boy and the dog do at the park? Nothing, the dogs dead

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What did Kane Larkin get on his birthday? Cancer...

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What happens to a fish with no fin on the right side? It repeatedly swims in a circle.

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Knock knock Come in

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Hey I just met you and this is crazy but here's my chew toy throw it maybe!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops