What do you do when the Cubs win the world series? Turn the xbox off and go to bed.

roses are red violets are blue they really are

"What dosen't kill you makes you stronger" Except losing your arms.

Why was the man alone? Because he was tied to a tree.

once i was a dog and u were a flower........... i raised my leg and gave u a shower :)

How many surrealists does it take to change a light bulb? One, its not a difficult task.

Why is 6 afraid of 7 ? : Because 7 8 9

What do you call a deer that has no eyes? I have no eyedeer

What is the difference between a calendar and you? A calendar has dates!!

Did you hear about the dyslexic insomniac that stayed awake all night wondering if there really is a dog?

They say duck tape can fix every thing, Not my grandma's cancer for that matter.

Why does Michael J. Fox make the best milkshakes? Because he uses the best ingredients.

Q: What causes earthquakes? A: Your mother walking.

There were two blondes at an ATM. One was entering her PIN number and the other one says, "Haha! I know your password! It's ****!" The other one replies, "Haha! No, it's 1358."

9 tottenham fans walk into a french bar 2 minutes later French fans attack them saying this is for making our history lessons boring 1 shouts ohh the holocaust French fans ash him even more 5 say there call the jew squard next minute there getting attacked by a bunch of kids and lying that there were 30 neo Nazi men.

how many jews does it take to screw in a lightbulb? one................ standing on a pile of dead babies.

why did Sarah fall of the swing... she had no arms Knock Knock.... Whos there .... Not Sarah

What is long, hard, and full of seamen? a school bus, if you consider children to be seamen

why did the Mexican eat a octopus because he was hungry would die if he didn't

A mother with a bum hip and her son go to walk up a set of stairs in the mall. The floor was slippery because the janitor just mopped the floor. They decide to take the elevator instead.

Did you hear about the Australian man who was jumped by a gang of Americans with knifes? He had his cash and possessions stolen from him, and had to spend two weeks in hospital due to stab wounds.

Take part of what?

there once was a cat it was brown? fus-roh-dah

What's worse than finding a knife in your car? Finding a car in your knife.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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