Wanna know a secret? I didn't read or agree to the terms and services

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Why did the Jewish man leaves a coffee shop without leaving a tip? He was homeless and spent his last cents on the coffee.

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How many frogs does it take to change a light bulb None. Frogs lack the cranial capacity to change said lightbulb. If eventually by evolution they become smart enough to change lightbulbs, they may learn to handle machinery and pose a real threat to humans.

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A man walks into his room with a DVD and a box of kleenex. The DVD is a wedding video of his now dead wife.

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how do you stop santa from laughing? snap his neck.

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Yo mama is so fat that she is in a diet and wants to lose weight by eating healthy.

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What is grey and transparent? An elephant in a zip-lock bag.

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whats worse than 10 dead babies in a bucket 5 are alive and eating the others

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What did the single woman get for Christmas? Raped.

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Q. How do you wake up a sleeping rich man? A. By splashing acid in his face

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Anti-jokes are funny.

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Three soldiers, one Japanese, one American, and one Italian were stuck in a desert. How did they escape? A rescue squad of thirty trained troops came down in a helicopter and brought them each to their respective homes except the Italian who was actually a M.afia boss so they put him in prison.

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A horse walks into a bar. The bartender asks "why the long face?" The horse does not reply as it is a horse and horses cannot speak. The bartender realises his stupid mistake and calls the farm the horse came from. The horse is taken back to the farm and fed some hay. The bartender carries on living his life and then dies of natural causes at a very old age.

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do you know what happened to the bravest warrior in the battle who got stabbed in the foot while trying to rescue puppies from a burning building and dying children? well he took the children and puppies home, and ate them. then the SWAT came in and killed him. so yeah... oh... suck my a s s barf

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When life gives you lemons You've got some lemons.

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What is my cats favorite college? Harvard

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What happened when the dinosaur walked into a lake? It got wet

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Whats the hardest part of a vegetable to eat?? The WheelChair

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" Want to hear a good anti-joke?! " " Sure! " " Me too. "

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What did the cracker say to the cheese? You're so cheesy.

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1657 is a cool number, when a leprachaun sings it sounds like pie drinking an obese penguin (do you know what I mean....) :D

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Why did the guy in the ferrari stop? -He hit the median at 100mph.

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what did the unicorn say to the centaur? nothing because neither exist

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What did the black kid get for Christmas? Your bike.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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